I find that a lot of people are curious about breaking down marketing services like social media and search engine optimization to an hourly rate. I know this, because a lot of people search the Internet for pricing information and find me.
Silly me, I don’t have a standard rate sheet, but I will tell you why. I don’t know how much it will cost to perform SEO or social media marketing until I know what a company wants and needs from the services.
I understand the concern of marketing cost. After all, the reason for a company to spend money on marketing is to achieve a higher profit. This means the cost of marketing will be a factor. However, it is too common that the only set of numbers a client will clearly understand is the outgoing money, while they ignore the more important numbers such as accurate projections, goals, and increased profit.
The cost of marketing is not the same for any two projects, because the associated tasks are as different as the company itself. More importantly, marketing is something which spans the life of a company, and not just a set of tasks that are finished in a set number of hours. If you shop for marketing by seeking to buy a set of tasks, then you are essentially dictating a job, rather than letting the professional do the work they are trained to perform.
Reasons Marketing Cost Varies, and Menu Pricing Fails
Menu style pricing works great for some marketers, but it can create a huge disaster for the client. I don’t have time to list all the reasons the cost of marketing can vary widely, and you don’t have the time to read that list. I’ll give you a few points to consider.
Some companies will have well-formed projections of their market potential, and some will have already done the research to know how many people they must reach to achieve their goals. Some will have a targeted marketing strategy already prepared, and most will need help improving it. Some will have already performed A/B testing to determine their optimal conversion rate. Some will have creative ideas for their marketing, and even have talented people to help implement it.
Some companies have all of these things in place, but this is often not the case. Instead, I find that they come to me asking me to do whatever it is I do, without really even knowing what needs to be done. Then, without understanding the tasks, or reasons for them, they want a shortcut answer to “How much does it cost?“
The question of how much it will cost, without a clear idea of what is needed, or what will actually improve your return on investment is an easy way to waste money and time doing the wrong things. It is like shopping for a dentist by seeking the cheapest price for a filling while what you really need is a root canal. Worse yet, it is like telling the dentist how to perform the filling, and asking for a discount because you used less Novocaine. With that kind of thinking, should there really be any wonder why most marketing fails? Dictating Social Media Tasks is Like Telling Your Cab Driver to Swerve for Giraffes
Would You Buy a Cab Ride Priced by the Pothole?
It makes me wonder how many companies pay their building lease by the hour. What if they booked flights by the mile? Would you pay extra to fly around a storm? Would you tell the pilot which way to fly, or would you rely on the professional?
Some things just don’t sensibly calculate in the terms we think they should, or wish they would. It is not always because somebody is trying to hide an obscene profit. Many times, it is because the cost would be outrageously high to account for each item granularly. Imagine trying to account for a cab ride that includes a charge for every time the cab hits a pothole and gets a little closer to needing a new set of tires or shocks. Should stopping for traffic signals cost more to account for the brake wear, or should we burn more gas and take the longer route to avoid them?
The challenge for a lot of people to realize is that the cost of any product or service will be built into the price. The cab driver will need to receive more money for his job than what it cost him, so he sets his pricing and maintains his car to optimize his earnings. If you asked him to itemize each thing, you would have to pay him for that extra time he is doing accounting instead of driving his cab. If your driver lets you blindfold him and direct him how to drive, you are both foolish.
My point here is to express how easy it is to make mistakes when shopping for and comparing services in an unfamiliar industry. In the industry of online marketing, if you pay for somebody to account for every hour, you will likely pay a lot more for the extra accounting.
Then again, I guess I shouldn’t complain if somebody wants to pay me for the hours I lie in bed at night staring at the ceiling as I ponder how I can make them more successful tomorrow than yesterday.
Persistence is important in marketing. If you give up too soon, you could miss a huge opportunity. On the other side of the equation, if you are trying to fly a lead balloon, it is best to stop before wasting any more time and money.
I want to inspire you with some questions about your marketing, and your business challenges. You don’t have to answer, but I hope you will. So, let’s start thinking about some things that can ground your marketing.
Know When to Change Course
How do you define the point when it is no longer productive to keep doing what you are doing? If you don’t know when to implement changes, it can destroy your company. What is the right answer? Is it when the competition starts taking away market share? Is it when the budget runs out? Is it when the company goes completely broke? Is it before all of this begins to go wrong, and you can take a proactive approach? Let’s consider this quandary, because although it may not be comfortable, knowing when to make changes is imperative to the growth of a company.
Have you ever pulled the plug on a marketing campaign? I have, and sometimes it was too late, but other times it was too early. I lived, and I learned. It sometimes felt like I was one of The Wright Brothers, crashing airplane after airplane trying to get it right. If you have ever really tried to make a business fly, you have probably felt the same way. Sure, there is value in mistakes, but there is even more value in learning to avoid them!
Look at the efforts in this early flight video, and tell me if it feels a bit familiar to you.
Marketing really doesn’t need to be so painful. The information you need to know is right there at your fingertips. Yes, right there at the computer you are gazing into, but it will only help if you learn how to use it. Even then, it does no good if you don’t actually make the tough decision of putting it into action.
If Your Marketing Won’t Fly, You Need to Know Why
How do you avoid the failures and cut straight to the part when your marketing soars like an eagle? That is tricky, and it is as unique as the company itself. You cannot eliminate all mistakes, but you can come a lot closer, don’t you think? I think we all can.
Something that many companies hesitate to embrace is that a marketing campaign should be carefully researched, or it should not be launched at all. When companies neglect the value of market research and planning, it is usually because they have already reached a point of desperation. This is often geared to cut corners, but it is about the worst place to make cuts. Another reason I see companies skip market research and planning is because they simply fail to realize how much they don’t know about growing a business. They may know their business, but know little about how to make the business grow.
Shortsighted marketing is especially common as social media marketing has become a perceived savior of the business world. This can all be used to your advantage, but not if you are doing the same things, and making the same marketing mistakes the competitors are.
Social Media Made Marketing Easy … Mistakes and All!
During my 20 plus years in marketing, I have made a lot of observations. What I have seen in recent years is a far greater tendency for under-funded and poorly planned companies to try and emulate competitors, rather than stand on their own unique merits. I call it imitation marketing, and imitation marketing means imitating failures, too. It does not fly well.
Along with the social media marketing craze where everybody wants to become a marketing professional, a lot of talent has been discovered. Far more often, it has led to massive amounts of waste created by squillions of people trying to earn as they learn, instead of earning based on their experience, knowledge, and marketing talent. I’m not exaggerating when I say that social media has as many downsides as it does upsides, and this is a huge downside!
Projections became more like a drunken bar room shootout for a lot of companies, and based less on solid mathematics and science, and more on luck. This makes absolutely no sense to me, because there is no other form of marketing that is more measurable than that which is performed with a computer. Computers record data and organize it very nicely, but some people still question the measurement, or the ability to hit the target. That sounds completely absurd to me, but then again, I have worked with it every day, since the 1990’s.
A Crash at the Air Show
Wouldn't Orville Wright's Diary Help You Fly?I often watch unprepared marketing departments and small business owners running off customers by crashing their plane at the air show. They finally get an audience, and they make a bad maneuver. Worse yet is when they strafe the audience.
Firing into the crowd and hoping something hits the target is popular, but it yields a low return on investment (ROI). In military or police terms, it is a “spray and pray” effort. If you spray enough bullets, and pray to the warrior gods, you may get through the battle alive.
Failure to implement a proper marketing strategy is often why small businesses remain small. I don’t think it is because they don’t want to do more business, but rather because they are overwhelmed.
There is much more to running any business than just the marketing. A challenge exists in realizing that good marketing is what makes a company successful. Marketing is what makes the difference between Coca Cola and other drinks that didn’t make it. It is a pretty terrible area to make mistakes, or take shortcuts.
There are many potential points of failure in any organization, but making your company more marketable, and actually marketing it well, can make the difference between huge success and utter failure. It makes the difference in whether it will fly, or it will not.
What Challenges Your Marketing Flight?
I want to know what you think. What are your biggest challenges, or the challenges you see other companies facing? What do you think companies are missing in their marketing? Is it ineffective market research, lack of marketing creativity, failure to budget, fear of loss, or the monster of all monsters … complacence?
You name it … I want your opinions, and I hope your insight may help others.
Let’s do some learning together. I would not ask you these questions if I didn’t want to learn, too. If you struggle with an answer, here is another way to look at it: What obstacles do you think hold a company back from hiring an experienced flight engineer like myself? Please share your insight.
People ask me all the time, for ideas about how they can make their business better, stronger, and more profitable. They want to know what will convince more people to spend hard-earned money with their company.
I usually have some useful tips for them. I love to help, and I enjoy the look on their faces when they say “Why didn’t we ever think of that?” It is even more adorable when they call me to tell me that they implemented the tip and it is working for them.
It feels great to be helpful, and it keeps me sharp with new ideas. It is also why I write this blog, and why you see my direct phone line at the top of every blog post with the statement “I am always ready for a brainstorm. Call me at *REDACTED DUE TO AGING WEBSITE*.”
One of my best tips, in a single word, is “Awesomeness”. I will explain this, and how you can create greater awesomeness for your customers.
Being Helpful Grows Awesomeness!
I want to explain a principle that may seem scary to some people, but it is one which has served me very well in life, and in business. It requires patience and practice, but it has never failed me in the long-term. In order to explain it best, I will use my own experience. I could explain it in some fancy theoretical terms, but this comes from real life … my real everyday work.
It is my job to provide answers for improving companies and making them more marketable. I do a lot of my work free of charge. Well, at least I try very hard to blog about it in ways that people can use it. I’d call that work, so yes, I do a lot of my work for free.
Since I only work with a very small number of clients, and because a company has to be pretty serious about their marketing to hire my services, I make many efforts to help others without digging into their pockets. Don’t worry, it is not some kind of Jedi mind trick (video reference), and I am not selling something here. Being helpful gives me good karma, mojo, luck, or whatever you want to call it.
Being helpful is a principle that is used in abundance by successful companies, and successful people. You really don’t have to look around very hard to see this in action. It is a principle that is even more important when applied to the Internet, and I’ll tell you why. When it comes to Internet dealings, people have a very strong filter for noise. I wrote about this a while back, in an article titled “Will Your Social Media Noise Withstand 2011 Filtering?” They are also commonly very skeptical. There is a lot of “crap” on the Internet to overcome, as a consumer.
Many companies use blogs and other social media tools to be more helpful and interesting to their potential market. When they provide useful information, it brings attention to their brand. It is a means to express a company’s awesomeness and to put their helpfulness to work, and their company culture on the front line. There are many good reasons for companies to have a blog, in fact, I can offer you 10 really good reasons to blog.
I could stop right here, but I just told you this as a preface for the real point of this article. You can stop here, add your comments, tweet it, Facebook it, blog about it, and etcetera, but there is more! Yes, it is lengthy, but that is why there is a play button on my blog (at the top). If you don’t have time to read it, at least care enough about your business to push play and listen.
What Do They Pay For? That’s Right … Awesomeness!
The principle of being helpful is only one piece of success, but a huge piece that a lot of companies totally neglect. Somebody has to pay for all of that helpfulness, or the company would go broke. So, a lot of companies are left with a question of who will pay for that? Can you believe it? Companies actually treat it as a “dilemma” of whether it is a good idea for them to be helpful. This is why I find that even when they are helpful, they seldom make it to “awesome” status.
Awesomeness Creates More Business
The reason I mentioned this principle of being helpful is because I want you to pay attention without thinking I am here to sell you something. Call it a bonus, and whatever you do, please try to implement that tip. Be helpful … It is for your own benefit!
Now I am going to tell you what people actually pay me for, and explain ways you can benefit from it without having to pay me. Come to think of it, this may not go just right, but I am pretty sure I am not obsolete quite yet. In any case, I want you to use this for your own gain.
This May Not Be Awesome, But it is Helpful!
As a marketing guy, a huge amount of my work is not focused on helping companies with the obvious marketing task of getting their name in front of more people. Does that sound strange? It probably sounds totally crazy to a lot of people. In fact, you may be wondering, “Where in the heck do you find these idiots who pay you, Murnahan?” Yes, I am paid by aliens from another planet … but they are very successful Zarkmobians from Planet Narburloid.
It is true, though, because a significant amount of my work involves making them more marketable. That means digging into who they are, as a company. They pay me to develop a strong understanding of who they are, and to uncover what makes them more like sex, bacon, and other things people love. My job is to get a solid grasp on their “awesomeness” by viewing the culture of the company from a unique perspective. With this, it is my responsibility to create their best marketing strategy.
You can get a better picture of your awesomeness by talking to people. Ask people you respect. Ask people you don’t respect. Ask people who buy from you. Ask people who don’t buy from you. Ask without a word, by researching your market, and uncovering the real forces that drive your market. Ask a lot of questions, and pay careful attention to the answers. This will help you to discover your best customers!
Discovering the Model Customer
Once I know a company’s best assets (their awesomeness), I can begin the research to build a perfect model of their customers. Knowing the right audience is extremely important, especially if you want a return on your marketing investment. I wrote about this a couple times recently, and I hope you read those articles. I will add some links below, but if you are not a subscriber, do it now … it is free. I will say it again, though … ask a lot of questions, and pay attention to the answers. Below are some links to help you with your customer modeling, but note that they will only help you if you use them!
After the ideal customer models are in place, I can accurately direct my clients as to how they fit into their marketplace. Then, I can also provide steps to better adapt to their market. This is when the real awesomeness is unleashed. It is completely different for every company, in every industry.
If you do not know your competition, you probably don’t know your market very well. You need to know your market before you can even begin to get ahead. If you learn the forces working against you, it will be a whole lot easier to overcome them.
Spend some time knowing your market, including your competition. Most companies do a terrible job of this, so it is like low hanging fruit for you. Pick it!
Producing Awesome is Not Easy!
Most companies simply cannot see their business clearly from a marketability standpoint, and it becomes their Achilles heel. This destroys many companies.
Achilles Marketing Heel
Even when they think they have a good grasp on their “awesomeness”, most companies do not express it very well. I have said a lot about good reasons to blog, and good uses for social media. None of it centers on the use of destructive interruption marketing.
The challenge here is to present your company in a way that it is appealing to the customer, based on what they want, instead of just what the company wants.
I return to the principle of being useful. Most companies, including your competitors, will not have the required patience to be useful and give their customers a reason to buy from them. Many will just hope to flash a sale price and scream their selling message, but only a relatively few will put aside the selling enough to understand what will inspire buying.
Most companies (yes, most) will choose to skip the important research. It is not easy work, and it bores a lot of people to tears. It becomes too much hassle to actually build their understanding of the customer. For a lot of people, it would be cruel and unusual punishment just to finish reading this article, not to mention actually implementing the suggestions.
Here is where the punishment really pays off: If you understand your customers’ motivations to buy, and address it properly, they will tell each other. Your job becomes a lot easier.
Delivering Awesomeness to The People
Once the marketability factors are perfectly in place, it is a whole lot easier to deliver it to the people. Delivering something marketable to the people is simple! Have you seen how many amazing tools there are for delivering a good message to people? Just think of the first ones that come to mind. Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Google, blogs … and the list goes on.
You want some awesome? Check this out! Here is some unsuspecting awesomeness for you. They didn’t seem all that amazing to me at first, but you would probably never believe me if I told you how many times these made my phone ring. These are just a couple of many examples, but the articles below make a good point.
So you must be asking, “How did these make the phone ring?” It was because those little pieces of awesomeness made people think. They made people laugh. They compelled people to share them with others, and they created a squillion new links to my blog. Bonus Points: They were also extremely relevant to my industry.
Those links enhance my SEO (search engine optimization), and reflect credibility to search engines by showing popularity. That credibility helps everything else I write about to rank higher in search engines. That is how SEO works! This matters far more than the mechanical approach to SEO. The trick is to be awesome as often as possible, or at least as a high percentage of your efforts.
Are you getting it yet? A little bit of awesome carries a long way. I don’t make “awesome” happen every time, and you will not either. I know when it is needed, how to do it, and why it matters. That comes with practice, so start practicing!
How much more can I say? I gave you a lot of good links within this article, and I did not include a single one to waste your time. I just gave you tools to learn and implement excellent marketing. I hope I have encouraged you to take the same approach of researching your market and to provide value to your potential customers.
I suggest that you give in order to receive. As an example that I mean what I say, I am giving $5,000 just to receive an introduction to somebody interested in paying for my services. That pretty well covers the “awesome” and the “helpful” in my book.
Of course, companies pay me for a lot more than what I included here. If you have the time to exercise your patience, and put some practice to use, you will find a whole lot more free assistance in my blog archive. I do it to be useful, and that works for me. I believe it will work for you as well.
I will allow you this moment to practice being helpful and awesome. This is your chance to add your helpful comment, and share how you apply these principles, or how you feel you could do better. If you want to get outrageously helpful, give this a tweet, a Facebook like, a stumble, a digg, or whatever it is that you do to share helpful things with others.
Do you sell something that has a potential market of “everyone”? Maybe you sell widgets, doodads, or gadgets that everybody in their right mind should own. If you treat your marketing that way, you are probably pretty frustrated.
I learned this the hard way, many years ago, by thinking that “everybody” was my target market. I remember when I sought out my market with thoughts like “Who wouldn’t buy my stuff? They must be crazy if they don’t buy!” Then I parked my bicycle and quit my paper route.
I learned what it meant to target my marketing. I stopped wasting time and money trying to reach everybody with a good reason to buy my stuff. The result was that I sold a lot more stuff.
When I stopped viewing everybody as a potential customer, I also stopped seeing them all as the “deadbeats” who wore me down and just wouldn’t buy. I started loving them more each day, and it turned out that my business grew massively.
Carefully conceived targeted marketing is a huge factor of success in a business. I don’t just mean targeting your market for every customer who will buy, either. I mean targeting your market for the customers you want, and who will help your business to grow.
I want to help you to avoid this common oversight, because it is in the top five most costly business errors. It runs close behind killing a hooker (and getting caught), or naming your child Bernie Madoff.
If you try to market something by believing your ideal target market is “everybody”, it is like hunting elephants in a termite mound. You will find a lot of termites there, but very few elephants. Many people only believe this after a “less-than-ideal” profit and loss statement proves it to them.
Marketing to Morons, Idiots, and Fools
Sure, I still think that most people are just totally insane if they don’t write me a check, give me their credit card, or provide me the passwords to their massive offshore bank account. They should at least send me a box of cigars and a bottle of Bourbon to butter me up. I mean, after all, I know it is mathematically factual that I sell something which returns more money than its cost. What kind of moron can’t see that?
Let me tell you something you you probably already know. There are a whole bunch of crazy, “idiots, morons, and fools” out there who will not buy what you sell. Even if you are selling the cure for cancer, free money, or a magical 24 hour orgasm, it will not sell itself. It will also not sell to “everybody”. Marketing to “everybody” as a prospective buyer would not even be a wise marketing approach if Coca Cola, McDonald’s, and Microsoft merged.
When you consider it closely, maybe they are not all such idiots, morons and fools. Instead, maybe it is your lack of targeted marketing, using data-driven customer modeling and calculated market segmentation.
Targeted marketing is exactly why I don’t write this blog for idiots, morons, and fools. I write it for people like you, who will appreciate good marketing ideas, pass them along to others, and add to the conversation with your comments. Actually, I don’t rely on the blog comments so much, because my target audience is pretty shy, but they do share a lot.
Target Market Segmentation Challenge
My challenge to you is to take the time and effort to segment your market more carefully. Start thinking in terms of demographics, psychographics, geographics, and who your best customers really are. What spins their fan, and what can you do to make your brand more like sex, bacon, and other things they love? Where will you reach them, and what will inspire them? Use what you know, expand what you know, and get creative with your marketing.
Targeted marketing seems very foreign to many people, but the good news is that this includes your competition. Just like everybody is not a customer, everybody is not a marketing genius either. Understanding a market requires marketing talent, which comes with practice, accurate data, and the right set of marketing tools. Unless you are willing to hire a professional, you will need to practice, and practice a lot.
I think of it like a trip to the gun range. Sure, I like to bring a lot of ammunition, but it is even more important to use the right gun, and learn how to aim it well. A sniper rifle is best, but many people fear that level of commitment to their marketing. So it is best to at least learn how to aim what you have. A Lot of Ammunition is Good, But Sharper Aim is Better!
Practice Targeting Your Market
Maybe you believed that optimizing your marketing reach would be easy in the beginning, but you surely know better by now. Look at your market penetration and consider these questions:
Are getting all you can (or at least all you want)?
Are you getting huge buyout offers?
Are you expanding your company at astonishing rates that would make Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg blush?
If your answers are “no”, then you need more practice to hone your skills. It will not kill you, and in the off chance it does, it was nice knowing you. If you are not afraid of dying, keep reading for thoughtful encouragement.
Practice your creative thinking. Practice your analytical thinking. Figure out who wants what you have, and what they will respond to favorably. Don’t try to reach them all. I know that it is hard to overlook all of those potential customers, but you will reach a whole lot more of them if your marketing is targeted appropriately.
If growing your business really matters to you, be ready to lose some sleep for it. Perfect customer modeling takes a lot of marketing talent and creativity. These are things you can improve, with enough effort.
Back to the gun analogy: You can make a lot of noise and scatter a lot of lead with a 12 gauge shotgun. It is particularly good for scaring your customers away, but not very good for hitting them in the heart, where you want your brand to penetrate. When you hit your market in the heart, you will find a lot more love flowing in both directions.
Shotgun Marketing Scares More Birds Away
If you don’t have the time or skill to become a true marksman, it is best to either rework your schedule to develop your abilities, or find a good hired gun.
I will part with some articles related to targeted marketing. There are more in my blog archive, and more yet to come. Check them out and subscribe for more bits of marketing brain food coming soon.
Bloomingdale's Douchebag Award
I have a question for Bloomingdale’s, and then I will move on with the story. Here is my question: “Dear Bloomingdale’s: Did you bump your collective head?”
Bloomingdale’s department store sent me a cease and desist notice for mentioning them, along with a link to their website. Strangely, I find that other companies such as Microsoft, Apple, Pepsi, and other brands don’t seem to mind positive mention from the public. No, instead, they seem to like all of those mentions of their brand name along with links to their websites. It is what makes them more popular, and it is good for SEO. That means search engine optimization, Bloomingdale’s.
Do you ever come across a company that makes you absolutely convinced that somebody “upstairs” in the corporation took one too many drunken stage dives? I do, and I got that feeling today when I sorted through an email spam folder. I discovered threatening letters from Bloomingdale’s department store claiming they plan to sue me if I do not remove their name from one of my websites.
So, what in the name of all things rational is fleeting through the legal minds at Bloomingdale’s? Are they trying to squash all mentions of their brand name on the Internet, or did they just pick on my 2002 relic that listed their website in a shopping directory?
Aside from the fact that they emailed me a spam-ish form letter, it kind of made me wonder if they just don’t receive the Internet over in their part of the world. Oh yes, Bloomingdale’s is based in New York, NY, and I know they must have access to mostly the same Internet as the rest of us. It seems odd that they didn’t figure out those links are good for them.
Maybe they are just too damn tired of being in business and want to call it quits. Maybe they have enough business, and just thumb their nose at all of the rif-raf out here on the silly and icky Internet. It beats me, but there is definitely something resembling last year’s tuna salad. It doesn’t smell healthy to me.
It made me wonder just what asinine sort of “unbranding” they are seeking by picking on me. Bloomingdale’s actually wants to erase a positive mention and a website link to their company, and they threatened a lawsuit to make it happen. Who is running the Bloomingdale’s Internet campaigns? Is it the “stars” from Jersey Shore?
To me, it seems they are having one of those moments that you or I may call a “shit the bed” encounter. You know, one of those times when you wake up ready for a challenge and say “Damn, I am feeling way too smart, and it has been a while since I topped my all time stupidest moment.”
Before I go too far, let me just say this: If you should choose to link to my website as a good resource for the SEO and social media marketing services I offer, it is pretty unlikely that I will send you nasty email messages filled with idiotic idle threats about suing you. I don’t sue for Twitter retweets, Digg votes, or Facebook likes, either. No, instead, I will more likely send you a pair of lips to virtually kiss you square on the mouth. In any case, I will not treat you the way Bloomingdale’s Department Store treated me!
Bloomingdale’s Threatens to Sue for Promoting Them
I have included letters that I received describing Bloomingdale’s threats to sue for using their name in a shopping directory (see below). I omitted the URL where the alleged offense occurred, but not because there was any violation. I simply do not intend to give the Bloomingdale’s website link on that page any further relevance by mentioning it here.
The website in question was from a retail example website for my wholesale Internet access company. It was created as a working demo for wholesale ISP (Internet service provider) clients. Although it once had many dial-up customers, we didn’t even market that site when it did have the option of signing up for dial-up Internet access. Our business is selling services to other ISPs.
Each of these letters from Bloomingdale’s are mostly the same rhetoric, and they each demand that I remove the content within five days. My thoughts for Bloomingdale’s are as follows:
Five days are up, Bloomingdale’s. Let’s shit or get off the crapper. Bring on the lawsuit and let’s see what the Internet public thinks of it. Maybe I will sue you back for being disastrously lame in your online acuity. My sense of the matter is that your legal and marketing departments should borrow a brain cell from a store clerk and stop fighting over just one.
At first, I was torn between whether to let you know just how badly you need my services to avoid coming off as a douchebag company, or whether to let others decide whether you are a douchebag company. I chose the latter, but you should probably read more of my work to determine the former. A better strategy to your online marketing efforts seems desperately in order.
Bloomingdale’s Demand Letters
Before I leave you to review the Bloomingdale’s demand letters I received, I want to say this:
Bloomingdale’s, Bloomingdale’s, Bloomingdale’s … nanny nanny boo boo. I used your name again. When you write up that lawsuit, just be sure to spell my name right.
Just one more outrageously funny thing I must mention is the Bloomingdale’s expressed concern for their name appearing in meta tags. That makes it seem even clearer to me that they are stuck in the “Miami Vice” and “Chaka Kahn” era.
Hello? Year 2011 calling Bloomingdale’s! If you are paying attention, you should probably have somebody in your “brainiac” eye tee department read “SEO Meta Tags: Oh, You Must Be Another SEO Expert!“ Perhaps they should check out the meta tags on this page while they are at it.
MARIE CAMACHO
FACSIMILE: 646-429-7521/22
EMAIL: infringement.response@macys.com
2/16/2011
VIA E-MAIL
Re: Notice of Infringement on the Bloomingdale’s Trademark
To Whom It May Concern:
This office is counsel to Macy’s, Inc., its subsidiaries, and operating divisions, including those operating Bloomingdale’s department stores (herein referred to as “Bloomingdale’s”.) Bloomingdale’s is the owner of all rights, title and interest in and to the BLOOMINGDALE’S® name and trademark, which is the basis for an extensive family of trademarks and service marks. The BLOOMINGDALE’S® family of marks is the subject of numerous active registrations with the United States Patent and Trademark Office for a wide range of products and services. Bloomingdale’s has continuously invested substantial time, money and effort in the marketing and sale of products and services represented by this mark nationwide. As a result, the BLOOMINGDALE’S® name has become famous. It represents an exceptional level of consumer recognition and goodwill and is a property of incalculable value to the company.
Bloomingdale’s recently became aware of your use of the Bloomingdale’s trademark in meta tags (and/or hidden text) at http://www.********* used to attract Internet traffic to your web site. Your use of this trademark to attract Internet traffic is an obvious attempt to capitalize upon the goodwill associated with Bloomingdale’s for your company’s benefit by diverting buyers. More particularly, the Lanham Act, 15 U.S. Code Section 1117 provides for recovery of profits and damages, as well as a sum of up to three times the amount of damages for violations of Section 1125(a).
Accordingly, demand is made that you immediately cease-and-desist from any further use of the Bloomingdale’s trademark name in the meta tags (and/or hidden text) on your web site. Additionally, we must receive your written assurances that you will make no use of Bloomingdale’s registered mark in your business affairs in the future.
Provided you immediately comply with our reasonable demands, a lawsuit may be avoided. If your unauthorized use of Bloomingdale’s intellectual property continues and we do not hear from you within five (5) days of the date of this letter, my client has already authorized the filing of a suit against your company, seeking immediately injunctive relief and all damages allowable under the law.
We shall be monitoring your website and await your response in writing to this office. Should you have any questions or comments regarding Bloomingdale’s position in this matter, please contact me via e-mail. Nothing herein shall constitute a waiver of any of Bloomingdale’s rights in law or in equity, all of which are expressly reserved.
Thank you for helping us protect our brand. If you are authorized to use our intellectual property and believe you have received this in error, please provide the name and number of your contact within the company in order to verify your use and close the matter.
Sincerely,
Marie Camacho
MARIE CAMACHO
FACSIMILE: 646-429-7521/22
EMAIL: infringement.response@macys.com
2/23/2011
Re: Notice of Infringement on the Bloomingdale’s Trademark
To Whom It May Concern:
This office is counsel to Macy’s, Inc., its subsidiaries, and operating divisions, including those operating Bloomingdale’s department stores (herein referred to as “Bloomingdale’s”.) Bloomingdale’s is the owner of all rights, title and interest in and to the BLOOMINGDALE’S® name and trademark, which is the basis for an extensive family of trademarks and service marks. The BLOOMINGDALE’S® family of marks is the subject of numerous active registrations with the United States Patent and Trademark Office for a wide range of products and services. Bloomingdale’s has continuously invested substantial time, money and effort in the marketing and sale of products and services represented by this mark nationwide. As a result, the BLOOMINGDALE’S® name has become famous. It represents an exceptional level of consumer recognition and goodwill and is a property of incalculable value to the company.
Bloomingdale’s recently became aware of your use of the Bloomingdale’s trademark in meta tags (and/or hidden text) at http://www.*********.com used to attract Internet traffic to your web site. Your use of this trademark to attract Internet traffic is an obvious attempt to capitalize upon the goodwill associated with Bloomingdale’s for your company’s benefit by diverting buyers. More particularly, the Lanham Act, 15 U.S. Code Section 1117 provides for recovery of profits and damages, as well as a sum of up to three times the amount of damages for violations of Section 1125(a).
Accordingly, demand is made that you immediately cease-and-desist from any further use of the Bloomingdale’s trademark name in the meta tags (and/or hidden text) on your web site. Additionally, we must receive your written assurances that you will make no use of Bloomingdale’s registered mark in your business affairs in the future.
Provided you immediately comply with our reasonable demands, a lawsuit may be avoided. If your unauthorized use of Bloomingdale’s intellectual property continues and we do not hear from you within five (5) days of the date of this letter, my client has already authorized the filing of a suit against your company, seeking immediately injunctive relief and all damages allowable under the law.
We shall be monitoring your website and await your response in writing to this office. Should you have any questions or comments regarding Bloomingdale’s position in this matter, please contact me via e-mail. Nothing herein shall constitute a waiver of any of Bloomingdale’s rights in law or in equity, all of which are expressly reserved.
Thank you for helping us protect our brand. If you are authorized to use our intellectual property and believe you have received this in error, please provide the name and number of your contact within the company in order to verify your use and close the matter.
Sincerely,
Marie Camacho
MARIE CAMACHO
FACSIMILE: 646-429-7521/22
EMAIL: infringement.response@macys.com
3/2/2011
To Whom It May Concern:
In order to avoid formal legal action, we are writing once more to follow up to our earlier letter to you regarding your use of Macy’s Inc. trademark (Bloomingdale’s) in the meta data of your website http://www.*********.com. As explained in our previous letter, Macy’s Inc. has well established rights in this mark and it is well known to consumers throughout the world.
As you know, Macy’s Inc. recently became aware of your unauthorized use of its trademark and sent you a letter requesting that you cease and desist from such use (and confirm same in writing). As of this date, we have not received a response from you about this matter, and the infringing content still appears in the code of your website. Your failure to act upon receipt of our notice underscores that your use is willful, exposing you to up to three times the amount of damages typically awarded for violations of Section 1125(a).
Your infringing use of our property is an obvious attempt to legitimize your website and/or divert traffic from this company’s authorized site. Accordingly, we reiterate our demand that you terminate the use of our brand in the meta data of your web site, and provide written assurances that you will make no use of Macy’s Inc.’s marks or other intellectual property in your business affairs in the future.
Provided you immediately comply with our reasonable demands, a lawsuit may be avoided. If your unauthorized use of our intellectual property continues and we do not hear from you within five (5) business days of the date of this letter, we reserve the right to pursue any and all remedies without further notice, including the filing of a suit against you seeking immediate injunctive relief and all damages allowable under the law. We shall be monitoring your website and await your response in writing to this email address.
Thank you for helping us protect our brand. If you are authorized to use our intellectual property and believe you have received this in error, please provide the name and number of your contact within the company in order to verify your use and close the matter.
Nothing herein shall constitute a waiver of any of Macy’s rights in law or in equity, all of which are expressly reserved.
Sincerely,
Marie Camacho
Photo Credit: Combination enema and douche syringe by Shattonbury via Wikipedia
