I made a follow-up call to a man about his marketing needs. He previously asked me to follow up, and so I did just that. Within about a minute of my call, he said “Well, this is a really busy time of year for us” and started with more excuse-crafting. I interrupted him to say “Hey Bill, I am not calling to waste your time” and quickly ended the call. What I really meant was that I was not calling to waste my time, and I think he got the point.
Bill is a man who knows very well why his company is bleeding money. He knows that he needs better marketing. That is why we have been talking. He expresses good intentions, but he always has an excuse. Is being busy a good reason to put off better marketing? Is money a good reason to put off better marketing? Is there really ever a good reason to put off something that will improve your business?
Let us consider where money comes from in most businesses. It comes from doing more business, and that means more customers. More customers comes from marketing. Is this really such a mystery?
“Procrastination Tax” is the Extra Cost of Waiting
People have been frustrated by taxes for centuries. They vote, they write their government leaders, and they even overthrow their government, but mostly they complain. They complain a lot! I hear people every day complain about the economy, and how everything is swirling down a big toilet bowl. I am not completely excluding myself. I don’t like it any more than the rest of you. The difference I make is that I realize one of the biggest “taxes” I pay is “procrastination tax”.
Putting things off until it is too late, or until the cost of waiting makes problems much worse is common. It is one of the easiest mistakes to make, and also one of the most damaging. The good news is that you have a choice.
For somebody like Bill who makes excuses, the additional cost caused by procrastination is high. He said that this is a busy time of year. It is the time when his business seems to be getting better. It only lasts for a short time, and then things will be slow again. Bill knows this, because he has been in his business and waiting for the next busy season for decades. Wouldn’t it make sense to maximize that seasonal opportunity, since it only comes once in a while? By procrastinating, Bill has effectively put off his best chance to turn his business around and stop losing more money until another year. Yes, another whole year before he will have another opportunity like he faces right now. Another year with mediocre results … and that is if all goes well. Another year to worry about whether he socked away enough to make it through the next slow period. Another year that he could have done more business and grown his company and had an even better year, next year.
I wonder how many years Bill can waste procrastinating before he realizes that action today is worth a lot more than action tomorrow. For some industries there is a year between each big rush, and for others it is a much shorter time. In any case, the tendency to wait for just the right time can have damning results to a company. I wonder how Bill will feel when he looks back a year from now and wishes he had set a better plan in motion. Oh yes, and next year will come … faster than ever.
Bill will always be waiting for something. While he waits for the perfect time, his procrastination tax is growing each day.
This reminds me of something my mother told me many years ago. She said “If you wait until you are ready to have children, you will never be a father.” I have three kids now.
Marketing Makes Eleanor Fly!
I have heard percentages of marketing efforts that do not work. I have witnessed those statistics enough to reach the top of my throat, and to declare that most marketing is little more than miserable failure, like the last squeak of a mouse in a trap. In fact, if you held my job for a day or two, you could even taste it like bad acid reflux. It is really true though, that most marketing falls on deaf ears, and the masses are immune to it. This is largely because these days, anybody with a computer and an Internet connection can bill themselves as an expert marketer. The barrier of entry no longer requires aptitude, experience, or even desire for anything other than somebody else’s money.
The odds of a marketer to recognize the root of our field as helping others with respect, dignity, and a desire to serve them has diminished to a point that skepticism is allowed to take over as a prevalent factor. This means that trust … hard-earned and well-deserved trust is due for a resurgence. A recall to the very root of the word “sell” is what it takes to be really great in a marketplace. If you have not learned this from your marketing pedigree just yet, the word “sell”, in this context, owes its origin to the Norwegian word “selje”. The literal translation is “to serve”, and that still means a lot to some of us.
The job of a professional marketer is to figure out that tiny fraction which does work. What we do is to serve our clients in a way which reflects our desire to benefit more than only ourselves, and to serve others at our highest capabilities. It means that a great marketer must look beyond the benefit of a few bucks today and understand the greater benefit of tomorrow.
A Happy Marketing Success Story
As the economy spooks many companies into bankruptcy and executive fears of failed marketing reach the brim of my digestive system and invoke my gag reflex, I want to tell you a success story. Yes, amongst all of the corporate scaremongering and enterprise torment, there really is success in the mix. This story is a real one, and if it is what I believe it is, it exemplifies success in the hardest market ever, which is to find personal and professional satisfaction.
Join with me and jump on board with my excitement for a moment. Raise your hands and start cheering while I share an exciting story of enterprise SEO success.
There is a company, a tried and true success in their marketplace, who picked up the mouse and found me. They searched for what I do, they took time to read a small share of my facts, figures, and persona, and we met by voice over the telephone. The story has more detail, which I will share as it unfolds, but for the moment, I offer you a piece of my expectedly upfront social media transparency.
The caller on the other end of the phone was a bright and cheery executive who revamped much of the delight that I have held so dearly as my ideal marketplace. This was not an intern at the local veterinary clinic asking how they could get a few more sick dogs to treat. It was not even an auto dealer seeking answers to social media marketing. It was a fellow gearhead executive calling on behalf of a gearhead company. He spoke my language, and we held discussions of real marketing beyond just the couple clicks up the roller coaster track that most companies will attempt before they take the chicken exit and get off the ride while the cars roll back into the loading area.
This guy was speaking my kind of language. You know, the language of waking up and smelling gear oil, coffee, and yesterday’s sweat. The kind of stuff that would intimidate Clint Eastwood and force Chuck Norris to turn in his “Man Card” and scream “Uncle” like a crybaby-sissy-bed-wetter. Yes, it was as if the Chairman of Manhood and the CEO of Testosterone were in stereo driving an epic bass line directly into my entrepreneurial earphones.
When I tell you this guy is right up my alley, I only claim that because I actually pictured him taking down six Chicago street thugs with nothing but a toothpick and a rubber band … yep, in an alley … my alley. Indeed, this dude instilled just enough of a masculine man-crush that when I told the story to my wife, she actually recounted it, in jest, with a boy-meets-girl kind of scenario and somebody was about to lean in for the first kiss. She didn’t get to the part where they sweat on each other, but probably just because that made her a bit weak in the knees. The fog of testosterone floating around would be enough to stop most hearts dead in their tracks.
In our encounter, it was as if I was driving Eleanor from the movie “Gone in 60 Seconds” and … well, like we were both driving Eleanor (e.g. Barrett-Jackson Auto Auction LOT: 1287). All but one detail, he actually has yet come to liberate my Eleanor-plus sized budget from the company’s board of directors. He will be working on them this week, and I will assist him in that jailbreak all I can. It will be important that my new gearhead friends understand that there is a vast difference between Lot 1287 and the dozens of other nice 1967 Mustangs in the list, and the difference is not all about the price … it is value which matters.
While we visited, I discovered the most awkward scenario. The company has me pictured as an in-house corporate SEO guy. At first, I felt a little tear on my cheek, because I know there are only a relatively few companies who understand the value that a C-level position in my industry can provide for them, or how much a long-standing CEO requires just to keep feeding his family. Then I started remembering how much I hate selling SEO. I mean, after all, you can Google something as simple as “sell SEO” or “how to sell SEO” and find that I know a lot about this business. My best scenario of how to sell SEO is just to be able to do it, prove it, and earn a squillion dollars from it. I already did that. My selling is over, and what I mostly want is to do the work I love, and to never have to slink my way out of a boardroom because some kid with less talent but a better line of garbage talked them into some cheap SEO. Realistically, any boardroom worth the table where they sit should be able to distinguish real marketing talent from a marketing representative waiting for his next diaper change. If they cannot recognize that difference, maybe a quick Google for “marketing talent” will flip the butter and the bread in the right direction and show them where the real deal lives and thrives. Where that butter meets the bread is with the guy holding uncanny skills (marketing and gearhead alike), a history of success, and a knack for telling what people need to hear even if it is not what they want to hear. That is a guy with the company in mind, whether he is working as their independent SEO consultant or as their boardroom fun department ready to whip out his clown nose and reveal his magic bag filled with market share, acquisition targets, increased leverage, stronger investors, retail fanaticism, and other boardroom delights.
In either scenario which my gear-hugging pals over there prefer, my Eleanor+ (performance bonus, equity, and etcetera) price point is a cheap jailbreak to fire up the passion of a real gearhead marketer who can come to the office and bang out high-compression gasoline flavored treats the way I would passionately provide for these guys.
I doubt they can afford me, but I am just as sure as motor oil and gasoline going to give them every opportunity to try. It really comes down to how their board of directors view the value of the Internet and my impact upon it.
To my new gearhead pals, I have a tip for your use in our synergistic battle in the boardroom. If they want to know how to justify SEO cost, just Google it! They will find the same guy as when you were seeking how to find SEO talent. 😉
NOTE: To my many longstanding and devoted clients, many of which have been with my services for a decade, please be aware that nothing will shake my devotion to you. You will continue to receive the highest attention from my highly capable support representatives, and you can expect the same level of service which you have trusted me with for so long. As you are surely aware, there is no dollar amount which can purchase my integrity.
A question came up today while I was talking with my wife as she created a masterpiece before my eyes. I asked her “do you ever impress yourself?” The natural answer that most people will give is “No, that sounds too arrogant.” She was not too off the mark from the popular answer, but based on her level of mastery, it puzzled me. It made me think deeper about a conversation that has taken place between myself and many clients in their boardrooms.
I want to explain that my wife is indeed a master at the work she does. She has many years of experience as an artist, and she deserves all of the kudos she receives for her work. In the instance of my question to her today, it involved her work in our cakes and confections business. She was creating flowers from scratch. She took sugar and turned it into flowers. I do not mean flowers like the average iron worker or Internet geek would make from sugar. She was creating lifelike flowers with petals, pistols, stamen, sepal, and other parts that many of us do not even realize flowers have. They are really delicate … like a flower.
I had to ponder why she would ever feel like she was not doing something spectacular. I mean, how many people do you know who can make a flower petal from sugar? Can they put it together with a whole bunch of other sugar petals and all of those other hard to pronounce flower parts and make them look like a real flower, and then sell them to people for the cake served on their wedding day?
This got me to thinking about the many times I have witnessed clients from my standpoint in my field of marketing who just don’t have a good handle on their value proposition. Their fear is often not so unlike Peggy’s concerns that she would seem arrogant, cocky, conceited, too confident, or whatever strangely negative twist you can put on doing something amazing that other people can see so clearly.
I think a lot of people have felt a bit kneecapped by the fine line between confidence and the point where it is distasteful to others. In the case of Peggy, just like so many others, they draw back so far from that line that modesty comes to take away their hopes and dreams. Modesty, when taken too far, can be devastating in a marketing campaign. I see it all the time that out of some deep-seated sense of modesty, a company culture will make it seem nearly impossible to reflect the true quality of their product.
In the course of this lengthy inner conversation, I had to confront myself. I am a race car driver, and in racing, I have always felt a bit shy with the flattering things people say when I come off the track. I know that other drivers are trying very hard to drive fast, and I want them to feel great about themselves. I don’t want to be the jerk to take away their glory, so I kind of hunker away and forget how well I drive.
YourNew.com Racing Corvette Z06: Driver Mark Aaron Murnahan
Confidence Perceived and Confidence Worth Stealing
I am a wickedly badass search engine optimizer and marketer … I can let that fly freely here on my marketing blog. I can whip the best of them, and I can quantify it in real numbers. Yes, I can back it up! What is profound to me is how the things where we seek the greatest gain in life is where we feel the most doubt. I love my work as a search engine optimizer and marketing consultant, so don’t get me wrong. I have done it for many years, and earned a handsome living following that passion. However, in my inner thoughts, I still feel that my big accomplishment will come from racing cars. I feel a confidence by driving fast, just as much as I do in the business which makes me money. In fact, before I lost millions of dollars in contracts during 2009 (and most of my ass with them), I was planning to retire next year and create a racing school to follow my passion.
How Money Changes Perception
It seems confusing and downright wrong how business endeavors make people more self-conscious than something perceived as a hobby. Noting that I am considering driving as my ultimate business endeavor, it really only makes sense when you examine how our modern society will criticize you more by things they perceive will matter to you or benefit you. What I mean is that I can tell you I am a badass race car driver and you do not feel threatened, because I am not trying to sell you a ticket to my next race or recruit you to my racing school. Racing does not pay me at this point. It actually has a cost to me of about $250,000 per race season, and a scheduled squillion-bazillion dollars to open a race school if I am done with this wicked-badass marketing gig before I am 300 years old.
You have no perception of loss just because I am fast, and I can even tell you I am fast. I am not a bad guy for being fast. Now if I told you that I am a badass at something which pays me money and feeds my family, you will be far more likely to take me to the ropes and beat me until I beg for mercy. How screwy does that sound, really?
Passion + Profit = Critics
This has all forced me to question how the things we feel the most passionate about are the easiest things to become modest about, and it is magnified if we actually receive a perceived benefit. I love racing. If I had to put this in terms for the average race fan without showing my modesty, I am one of the fastest men around a track you will ever meet in your lifetime. I have driven at speeds you will never comprehend and pulled off split-second saves, just inches from disaster that would have killed 99.9999 percent of people behind that wheel when the brakes got weak at 170 miles per hour. Now, if I tell you I have done the same thing and it helped me to buy a bag of groceries to feed my kids, it is strangely easier to criticize. OK, leaving the groceries and the kids out, if I said it makes me money, I am just a bit more of a bad guy. Don’t deny it … you see what a bastard I am if I charge money for my talents compared to doing something equally as passionate, but doing it for free.
Now then, why should Peggy feel awkward to express confidence about work done exceptionally well? Why is it easier for you to accept confidence about her work when the message comes from me rather than from her? Why is it even more exciting and acceptable to enjoy her mastery if you are far outside of her market area and you know she cannot sell you a cake? By the way, cakes are very hard to ship!
Why should I be so modest about the fact that I can own, manage, and drive for a race team that can take a track record on the first visit to a track? Why should I be so modest about the fact that I wrote three really good books in just three months during 2009? One of them (“Living in the Storm“) was written as my ass was falling off in business, but I completed it because I sincerely believed it would benefit others. Why should I be modest about the fact that more people read my work each month than reside in the city of Topeka, Kansas, where I live? Why should I be modest about the fact that I can rank my clients at the top of search engines for things which 99.9999 percent of the world’s competitors cannot achieve?
Well, I suppose that our reasons are not so unlike yours. Sometimes we just have to accept the talents we have developed and stop downgrading ourselves with the fear of the few jealous antagonists who will call us wrong for it while our fans are still waving our checkered flag and reveling in our winning the race.
I asked a few questions here, but what I really want to know is what you propose to do to stop acting like a Mark or Peggy? Maybe I can help. If this is the case, I will admire you for being uncommonly able to see beyond the perception of somebody having to lose just because somebody else gains.
If you like what I have to say here, please share it with others, regardless of whether I gain or do not gain. Your sharing of this line of thought with others may make a difference in not only the bag of groceries I bring home for my kids, but perhaps it could really help somebody else to gain a better view of their marketplace as well. Besides, if it helps you feel better, the vast majority of people it can help cannot afford to hire my services … marketing, racing, or shipping a four tier wedding cake. Oh, and I did not even mention the cost to have me write a book, but if I mentioned buying one for ten bucks, it would be even easier to see me as a bad guy. You see, that sounds kind of silly to not recognize your own contributions, right?
Have you ever wondered how there came to be so many Internet marketing experts and search engine optimizers in the world? My guess is because it is so darn easy a caveman could do it. At least it seems that is what they were told back at marketing school.
I love marketing. It is the only reason I watch the Super Bowl. I love to see great marketing, and to watch companies take off like an eagle. The unfortunate reality is that unskilled marketing flies with all the grace of the dodo bird.
I want to share two extreme examples of marketing failure I have recently been assaulted by. I received each of these in just the last few hours, and they come in great abundance each and every day. I think these examples explain a lot about why I encounter so many people skeptical about their marketing efforts. It is this kind of marketing that damages my whole industry.
Marketing Fail One: “Mould Providing”?
I will start with an email message I received only a few hours ago offering to sell me molds. Molds? Yes, molds! Why somebody would try to sell me molds is way over my head. This marketing failure was not only way off the target audience, but they even spelled the product name differently (language variance) in the subject line and body of the email. Then they went on to write the email as if they were the SEO just out of search engine optimization school trying to make the most of their keywords. I guess they needed to search engine optimize their email for some reason. Needless to say, I will not be purchasing any molds (or moulds either), so don’t even go there!
This goes well beyond just a language or cultural barrier, so before you give this “Marketing Engineer” a break, consider how he and millions of other spammers like him damage the marketplace for others. They collectively hinder the attention span and trust of each of us and make us more stubborn about our marketing expectations.
Subject: Mould Providing
Dear Sir/Madam,
Our company, King Mold Limited is located in Shenzhen City Guangdong province of China. We are middle size of mold maker company and about 100 machines in house. We made about 500 molds last year and 90% molds were exported to Europe, North American and other oversea areas.We are able to make small and simple molds, big and complex molds, we have made some insert molds, overmolds, two shot molds, gas assistant molds, unscrewing molds, hot runner molds and complex molds with many sliders drived by hydraulic cylinder.
Thank you for your time in advance. Your prompt attention will be highly appreciated!
Sincerely yours,
Tony /Marketing Engineer
You may be curious how Tony the Marketing Engineer targeted me for this brilliant marketing campaign. Yes, I was curious, too. You know, I love tracking things, because I am a marketer. This particular marketing failure came by way of email addressed to “thebigcheese@veryimportantguy.com” which is an address that I used in only one place … ever. That was in a blog article I wrote at “Mobile – Local – Social” titled “Cc: How Social Media Killed Email“, and I knew at the time some email spiders would come and scoop up the email address.
Marketing Fail Two: First Page Google Listing
First, I want to explain that this email came from my contact page here at aWebGuy.com and the sender had to pass a Captcha form to send it. What makes me want to reach out and ring the collective neck of this form of marketing “expert” is that it has lead a lot of people to really think of search engine optimization (SEO) as a joke. Here is the email I received:
Want more clients and customers? We will help them find you by putting you on the 1st page of Google. Email us back to get a full proposal
I wonder what, exactly they would like to get me ranked on the first page of Google with. Maybe the term “how to sell SEO“? Oh yeah, but I am already ranked in the top two for that search, and it has nothing to do with spamming people. I am already there for about a squillion competitive industry terms. I mean, it is what I do professionally. Maybe they can get me on the Google home page just under the logo … how much does that cost?
What really drives me nuts about this is that although it separates the good SEO and bad SEO, it still gives a lot of companies a real reason to hate people in my industry. It makes it even harder to overcome that disgusting image of some fat un-bathed guy in a pair of filthy nylon boxers sending out email and tweeting some crap about his new “earn money fast online” scheme and how he is the real deal and he can make your company successful overnight.
Screw it … I think I’ll go back to bed. My head hurts from thinking about it. If you leave me a comment, that is fine, but I am not buying any damn SEO or molds, so put it out of your mind right now!
It seems that the whole world is coming down pretty hard on BP these days. The company has been in a spotlight of bad press, but is all of the negativity really called for? I think it is time that we all take a moment and look at the bright side. Let us look at these reasons the BP oil spill is really not all that bad after all. I think we should go easier on BP and stop being so darn negative, so I have come up with a list of thirteen reasons we should give BP a break. In order to emphasize my points, I have included videos for your review and consideration. I also want to invite you to share your ideas.
Reason One to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: The Animals Were Dying Anyway
Those fish, birds, turtles, and other wildlife were going to die anyway. Nothing lives forever. Heck, most of these animals would just be eating each other if not for the oil spill. BP practically did them a favor. Who wants to be eaten?
Reason Two to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: It Was Not BP’s Accident
Just take it from BP’s CEO, Tony Hayward. As Mr. Hayward said, “It wasn’t our accident.” So there you have it. Get off their back!
Reason Three to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Tragedy Makes People Stronger
What does not kill you makes you stronger. Those people in Louisiana will thank BP someday. BP is just helping to toughen them up. Besides, they are providing alternate jobs to fishermen, and does anybody really like fishing? Why are these people so ungrateful? In the end, they will have more strength than they ever thought they would have. Didn’t Hurricane Katrina teach us anything? Some people called Katrina a disaster, too, but BP knows better.
Reason Four to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: The Spill Was “Relatively Tiny”
The explosion happened way out at sea. It is not like it happened in downtown Los Angeles. Besides, as BP’s chief executive Tony Hayward said “The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean.” In fact, he said this spill is “relatively tiny”, so why do people keep making such a big deal out of this?
Reason Five to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: It Got Grannies to Say “Friggin” and “Suck”
The Deepwater Horizon disaster got grannies to say things we may otherwise never see. I mean, how funny is it so hear an old lady say “friggin”. Is the humor worth nothing to you people?
Reason Six to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: All the New Jobs
It may have cost a bunch of oil workers their jobs, but look at all the cleanup, legal, and public relations opportunities it has created. See, and all this time you thought this was just a disaster.
Reason Seven to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: BP Makes Greece Look Healthy
Considering that the expected cost of BP’s oil cleanup and lawsuits far exceeds the amount of money Greece seeks from the International Monetary Fund, it should make us all feel better. After all, a lot of people are complaining about bailing out Greece, but it starts to seem like only a small amount of money when you compare it to BP’s upcoming losses.
Reason Eight to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Politicians Reveal Themselves
The Deepwater Horizon disaster helped to uncover where politicians stand. It often shows how stupid they are.
Reason Nine to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Diversion of Bad Press
BP chief executive Tony Hayward now has a worse approval rating than Barrack Obama, Sarah Palin, or Toyota. Somebody had to take the heat off. BP helped divert millions of eyes from other screwups. I mean, does Toyota really seem so messed up now?
Reason Ten to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: More Socialism for USA
This may not seem like a win for anybody with a sound mind, but it sure is a windfall for some idiots. With so many Americans looking for ways to become a socialist nation, this greatly expands opportunities for the government to run more business. Some have even suggested USA government seize BP the way President Harry Truman took over steel mills during the Korean War. With deeper roots into private industry … the oil industry … this could be a huge windfall for big government.
Reason Eleven to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Conspiracy Theory
If we never had something so extreme as oil spills or terrorist attacks, how else would we ever uncover all of the USA government’s plans to destroy the world and kill all its inhabitants through the decades?
Reason Twelve to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Fun With Nukes
Maybe you think it is silly, but just think about how infrequently we get to blow stuff up with nuclear explosions. Never mind any side effects, at least it could stop the oil spill. Besides, consider the great stories we could tell our grandkids about the three headed fish and how we saw it all get started.
Reason Thirteen to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Tony Hayward Wants His Life Back
Tony Hayward just wants his life back. Shouldn’t we respect the wishes of such a powerful man, after all?
