Marketing Clients vs. Crybaby Sissy Bed-Wetters

Scared Wet About Marketing
Scared Wet About Marketing

When people lack confidence in proper marketing, they lose! They lose time, they lose opportunities, and they lose money … lots of it! I don’t even feel a need to prove this, because for people who don’t get it, we have a phrase for that. The phrase is “survival of the fittest”, and if you have some guts, you are far more fit than a lot of your competition.

Believe me when I say that most of your competitors are total wimps! If we took them back to elementary school, you could see most of your competition walking to the office to call Mommy and ask her to bring a dry pair of pants to school. They are scared, and to say they are “pants-wetting scared” is not such a big stretch.

I mean, look at yourself … aren’t you just a tiny bit creeped out? Doesn’t it give you the willies just a little to do what it really takes to grow your company?

Seriously, if you never knew this, you deserve to know. Most people making decisions about marketing for their company are scared to death of marketing. I am going to share a real-life story with you in a moment to emphasize the point, but for a moment, just take it on faith.

This common fear of marketing is especially the case with the good kind of marketing that comes with proper research, solid strategy, efficient forecasting, and net profit … yes, positive return on investment. The reason the good profit-generating marketing is scariest of all is because it is the kind that requires decisive action … and money!

Drat! It’s another one of those long reads. Don’t worry, though, because I recorded it for you. Just click play and listen if you like. It is sure to give you some food for thought and a laugh … I’m sure of it!

The Way Many Companies View Marketing

A lot of companies seek the lowest possible effort and the highest possible return. That is smart business, but they often focus more on that low effort and completely lose sight of the highest return.

You see, now that every reception desk has a computer, marketing is pretty much free. Just look around and you may discover that this is how your competition sees it. Anybody can prepare and execute a brilliant marketing campaign. All they have to do is sign up for one of those Facebook thingies, Twitterize 25-26 hours per day, and put some smiley-happy employees and customers on YouTube.

Voila! The marketing is fixed, and the money train will be chugging down the tracks in no time!

It may sound crazy to you, and I hope it does, but this is really how a lot of companies approach their online marketing. It is so simple that all it will take is a tweet or a Facebook mention. They see companies like the ones mentioned in an article I read in Telegraph.uk. Here is a quote:

Ticketmaster estimates that every time one of their customers posts on Facebook that they’ve bought a ticket, their friends spend an additional $5.30 with the site. When last year’s Google conference was taking place, they tweeted the morning of the conference: “100 tickets left, 550 bucks a piece, use this promotion code”. 11 minutes later they tweeted, “Sold them, thank you.” That’s $55,000 in sales with one tweet in 11 minutes.

Rub a lamp and wish for a genie! You don’t have Ticketmaster demand or Google reach. Something is stopping you, though, and it is not the tools … it is the planning and strategy. If you keep doing what you are doing, you will likely keep getting what you get. If it is time to step it up, then step it up and do something brilliant. Do something with a strategy! On the other hand, if it is time to lie down and die … do that, and go peacefully. Just don’t keep waiting for that magic genie to arrive. He’s not coming!

Break for a Wise Marketing Tip:

Some people actually screw this all up and think that what they are paying for with proper marketing is just a task. Any moron can do a task, so it should be cheap, right? I provided some examples of this train wreck mentality in the articles as follows:

Social Media Marketing Pricing Like Cab Rides by the Pothole

… and the profoundly absurd

Hourly Rate for Setting Up Social Media Profiles?!

Damn the luck, it seems that somebody tried to shove the whole population of marketing professionals into the same cage as if we are all the same critter. The good and bad are all mixed into one, and along with my high-end marketing buddies, I guess people surely think that we get paid for what we do.

The larger truth is that we get paid for what we know, how we know how to know what we know, how we think and analyze, who we know, and the other really unimaginable stuff that comes with experience, marketing talent, and brute creativity.

Pete and The Amazing Pee-Pants Pizza Parlor

I have a story about a guy named Pete. Seriously, this is a true story. Pete is very excited about selling his wildly amazing and awesomely marketable pizza franchise across the USA. He will possibly succeed, once he gets out of his own way, but he is still walking around in wet pants and trying to keep from vomiting at the thought of finally bringing it to market.

Sure, Pete logically knows that marketing is his most important asset. He realizes that Starbucks was a little coffee company and Subway was a little sandwich shop, and still would be without great marketing.

Actually, his name is not Pete, and his business is not pizza, but I’ll use that. His name is close enough to Pete, and his retail food franchise business is close enough to pizza to make the same point. The story is about a series of calamities that just drive me nuts. Nuts enough to share my opinion, and to welcome yours.

Here is the “hot sheet” version of how things have gone so far. Pete contacted me a year ago about his business. He was referred to me by a friend whom he trusts. Our mutual friend told Pete that the project was way out of her league. She explained that based on his hopes for massive adoption of his new franchise opportunity, he needs Murnahan (that’s me). Not a guy like me … me!

When Pete first contacted me, he was in an urgent rush to get his marketing in order. He was very concerned that he had already waited too long. He was afraid that based on his time frame for other business plans, he needed me on the project “yesterday”.

Pete was more than just a little blown away by things I shared with him about the possibilities for his business. I guess it was stupid of me to start dolling out free brain-juice, but heck, he was a referral, after all. Based on his own wildly flattering statements toward me, I was assured that he wanted to be my client, so I let fly with a few pan drippings from my brain in the roasting pan.

Dumb dumb Murnahan … I knew better, because giving too much freebie talk is a big open door to truckloads of non-paying brain work. I do it though, and it almost always bites me in the ass, because people really hate that transition to actually paying for the knowledge they need.

Skipping forward a damn long year and a whole bunch of phone calls that he has never paid for, Pete is calling me with wet pants again. He needs some serious help, and he talks like he is actually ready now.

The huge pause in his business was a funding snafu. Wouldn’t you know it that somehow those banking folks actually like qualified market projections in the business plan before they fund a deal. It is too bad Pete never thought of getting some better facts to work with. Maybe a year wouldn’t have spun by so rough for him.

Well, I guess we’ll kill the hooker tonight and worry about it tomorrow. Now we can just wing it on a half-assed budget and hope to make the bank happy. Yep, that’s how we roll, right Pete and Pete-like thinkers?

By the way, when I tease Pete about his wet pants or describe him as a shaky handed sweaty little fella who pulls the blankets over his head so the monsters don’t get him, I want to note that I like Pete. I like him plenty fine, even if he is a crybaby sissy bed-wetter and horrific planner.

Pete is a fine fella, and he will likely do very well in his business. His first and scariest step will be to listen to the consultant / strategist as much as he talks. Actually, before he can meet that scary challenge, he will have to get up off his steamy little pee-soaked wallet and pay for the scary monster he needs advice from.

The craziest thing I ever heard was when he finally rubbed his wet panties into my telephone ear yesterday and started asking for references. What the hell? We covered that last year! He has been putting his short-n-chubby in my ear all this time, reading my blog, sending me Facebook messages, email, and asking me for more brain-drippings, and now he’s asking if I’m qualified?! This is the same guy who has referred others to me when they needed serious help!

His biggest expressed concern is that I am a few hour flight away from his cozy little blankie. He wants to be able to manage my work close-up. Well if that isn’t silly … all it takes is money. If he is doing it right … I mean, right enough to sell 150 pizza franchises in the next two years, the least of his worry should be the cost of an airline ticket!

Somebody just effin’ give me a tequila, a hooker, and quarter to call home and I’ll sell more damn pizza stores than this guy can handle.

Pete has hopes, but they are only hopes so far. They are not goals, because he doesn’t have the market data to set goals yet. He is pretty reluctant to gather it, too.

Why do people try to kill me like this? Is it because they don’t have confidence in their market offering? Is it because they are so scared they would rather go broke than invest wisely in their own futures? Is it because they have no balls? What the hell?

I swear, if I put Pete in a room with the guy I recently wrote about hoping to put “100 percent” into his health and beauty industry marketing, but yet keep the budget under $10,000, I could slow down time enough that my trip to the looney bin will feel like a whole lifetime! Maybe my conniption will be worth it.

OK … that got a little teensy bit rant-ish, but sure was fun! Go ahead and level me out. Be my friend and help me to calm down and breath slower.

😉

I sincerely believe that marketing in itself is the hardest field of all to market to clients. It is because in damn near every other product or service I have ever marketed, there is always some sense that the potential customer has two brain cells to rub together. This is often simply not the case when people are in the market for marketing services. Not since the invention of the Internet money-train.

One more thing … Can somebody tell me who I need to whack over the head to get a decent client with dry pants?

Confession of a Workaholic and Benefits of Unplugging

Confessed Workaholic Unplugged
Confessed Workaholic Unplugged


Have you ever been told that you work too much, or that your work seems to follow you everywhere? If so, I just want to offer up a thought that it may be because you are doing it wrong. Maybe I’m wrong, but what if I am actually right? Stick around and judge that for yourself.

I “unplugged” myself over the weekend, and it felt great. I spent very little time at a computer, and I only used my cell phone enough to be sure nothing was on fire in my professional life.

I remember times when I would feel guilty for taking a break like that, and I find that sometimes social media emphasizes the “rat race” feeling of having to be everywhere at once. Fortunately for myself and everybody around me, I learned how and why to let go of those guilty feelings.

I generally feel very proud of my work ethic. Doing my job well is important to me, and I know that a lot of other people must feel this way, too. I hope you do. A hazard that is easy to overlook is when you become so engrossed in work that you chase productivity right off a cliff. That is when the term “workaholic” generally applies. What workaholics often do not realize is when it is happening, or when to step back and take a fresh look. Allow me to share some thoughts and experience with you.

What if I Miss an Important Call?

Tell me if this sounds familiar. If you nod your head even once, I hope you have learned when and how to unplug. If not, maybe I can encourage you a bit.

I have been plugged into my job with the latest productivity tools that technology has to offer and remain that way year after year. I have carried smart phones since they first became available, and I have had mobile Internet at my side since its earliest availability. My job has always required it, and delegating the really important tasks to somebody else has often seemed impossible, or marginally possible but terrifying at best.

My example may be a bit extreme, but I know it will resonate with some micro-managers and other workaholics. You see, aside from being a marketing guy, I am also the CEO of a company that provides Internet services to service providers. Since 2000, I have been responsible for more servers operating in more data centers across America, and Internet connectivity to more end-consumers than all but very small number of people. When there are millions of dollars riding on things working perfectly 99.999 percent of the time, somebody has to hold ultimate accountability and make decisions in the event that thousands of websites or Internet connections are affected by a DOS attack or a router going bad. That is usually the guy with chest pains and a death grip on his cell phone.

When Cell Phones Didn't Fit in Pockets
When Cell Phones Didn't Fit in Pockets
Even long before that, I remember keeping a “bag phone” no more than a few feet away back in the 1980’s. You know, because a consulting client may have had some brilliant idea to run by me at any minute of the day. Yikes … it has actually been decades now. Time sure can slip by fast when you are running a business, and all that time, I have been just a bit uncomfortable that I may miss an important call.

My willingness to work harder and keep pushing my capabilities against all odds has served me well. I have grown some great companies, and I have had an exciting career. Like any career, it has had its ups and downs. Whenever it seems to become a bit lackluster, I start looking back into my career history to try and find patterns and to figure out what I am doing wrong … or what I am just not doing right.

A common reason I found for the productivity downturns is when I pushed a little too far beyond my optimal productivity and lost focus on the purpose of my career.

I think of it in terms of a Gaussian function … you know, like a bell curve. If you sit at the top of your productivity bell curve, you are doing it right. Pushing beyond that, you quickly enter a point of diminishing returns, and the productivity outcome is no longer worth the effort.

Yes, I am a math geek. Since I am a marketing guy, and a computer programmer on top of that, it should be expected. Don’t worry though, I will not drag you into a mathematical discussion of probability distribution.

Has Somebody Warned You About Workaholism?

Has anybody ever questioned how you keep on doing what you are doing? Maybe you have heard somebody ask “Do you ever sleep?” I have heard this a lot, but I always used to take it as a compliment. What I eventually realized is that it is sometimes better to take it as a caution.

I’ll give you an example. In about 2004, my wife told me that I was working too hard and that I needed to take more time for myself. She encouraged a hobby, so I began taking more time for an old passion of motorcycles. That carried on, and moved me on to my life-long passion for cars. Not just cars, but really fast cars, and racing them.

I Unplugged Behind the Wheel
I Unplugged Behind the Wheel
I took more time to unplug myself just enough to see why I worked so hard in the first place. When it came to the real purpose of my career, it had an emphasis in providing security for my family, and to enjoy some leisure. Realizing it enough to rejuvenate myself with the original passion required me to take a step back and see it as a part of the picture and not the whole picture.

Once I realized the important reasons I was working so hard, things went gangbusters. My business went crazy! Things were better at home, and we had more babies. As crazy as this may seem, each baby gave me a pay raise. It happened because I worked smarter instead of working harder, and I learned the value of balance. Don’t get me wrong, I was still carrying all the technology and productivity tools with me. I have still been on-call 24 hours per day since the 1990’s, but once I realized that my career was just a part of the bigger job of being happy … I got happier!

The power of a refreshed mind, and the power of happiness may seem mythical at times. The common wisdom is that you must keep your nose to the grindstone, walk on fire, and a whole lot of other uncomfortable things. If you really believe it when people tell you these things are the keys to having a successful career, I believe you are doing yourself a disservice. Endurance is extremely important, and unplugging can provide huge benefits. It is not all about how much pain and tragedy you can endure.

Business and Career Require Endurance, But Not a Grindstone!

Having peace in your career, and realizing that it is an endurance race and not a short sprint is a big step toward succeeding. Enjoying what you do, and looking closer at why you are doing it is far more valuable than grinding your nose and burning your feet. I am saying this from experience, and what I truly believe.

In a look-back, I find things I have known for years and told myself I would never forget, but I still seem to forget them somehow. One of them is the wisdom of knowing when to disconnect, and actually having the courage to do it. “Unplugging” can be a great chance to reboot and resume greater productivity, but easy to neglect until later.

I have been taking a closer look at myself and my career history recently. I look at some of the peaks in my own career, and I find that some of the most productive times have been when I realized when to push less. Sometimes the timing did not seem logical, because conventional wisdom says that when you are riding a huge wave, it is the time to surf with all you’ve got. Unconventional, but often more productive wisdom says that if you are not careful, burnout can set in even faster than expected.

My best times ever have come after remembering to relax just a little more and stop punishing myself. It has been a little while since I felt this way, but when I knew it and remembered it, I got happy. In fact, I got happy enough that I was earning more money every week or two than an average American family was per year … all while struggling less, working fewer hours, and enjoying everything a lot more than before.

That Track is Behind Me!
That Track is Behind Me!
Maybe you’ve heard the term “hindsight is 20/20”. Of course, that means you can see the past perfectly clearly. I don’t think it is quite that perfect, but it holds a lot of predictive data, along with all of that great stuff we call experience.

I pushed like crazy to build a company to pay me enough to feel satisfied. I kept pushing for as long as I saw continual progress, but then I learned when it was time to unplug, and even face my fears to delegate a few tasks when it was appropriate.

I think I’ll try that again. It was sure more fun than feeling guilty to take in a little leisure. It was more profitable, too!

I have just one more bug to put in your ear. If you know somebody needing to delegate their marketing more wisely, I will be delighted to hear from them. Oh, or a race team looking for a wining driver … I am well-qualified for that, too! 😉

Coming Soon: Maybe you’ll think it is completely nuts to unplug and take a step back. I will soon share something that gave me a good reminder to pull the plug. I think you’ll like it. I hope you’ll be sure to return.

Do You Accept SEO or Social Media Marketing Contracts Under $10,000?

Are Your Marketing Clients Broke?
Are Your Marketing Clients Broke?


I could sit here at my computer all day and tease people who are willing to take on small contracts in the field of SEO and social media marketing, or the clients willing to pay them. Many of those clients are broke, and there are a lot of bad people with an SEO and social media flag waving to attract the last of their money.

Giving them a hard time can be very fun, but it is not really all that productive. After all, there is a huge majority of small businesses who seek somebody to help them, but do not have the needed resources for a grand entrance to the online market. There are also some talented marketing minds who like working with small or short-term contracts. I prefer to help bring them together.

I don’t accept those contracts, but not because I am an arrogant jerk who thinks he knows it all. I don’t arbitrarily look down upon those companies, and I don’t automatically look down upon the people serving them. It is just not my market, and I turn away business every day because of this.

If you accept small projects in SEO and social media marketing, I have some free leads for you. I don’t mean just a bunch of shabby sales leads from people hoping to spend an hour of research online to find a free website that will earn them a squillion dollars. I mean real companies hoping to make an entrance to their market.

This does not mean that I am a bad option, or that I am expensive. I return huge profits for my clients, and I am worth many times my rates. It also does not mean that you are bad, or “cheap”. We all have our market space here, and mine is in long-term and well-funded strategic projects. In fact, you can use me as an example to show your potential clients that you are not just trying to rip them off. It really does cost a lot of money and work to create success. Bigger success takes bigger experience, bigger money, and bigger strategy. Those are the projects I accept.

I believe that we both have a similar challenge of building confidence in customers. I even expressed some troubling truths only a few days ago in a long-winded article about a short-sighted customer who has done business with me for years. Check it out for yourself: “Marketing ROI Factor: Are You a Client or a Customer?

In reality, the upfront cost of an optimal campaign in SEO or social media is prohibitive for the majority of companies. Sure, if they could pony up the money for a well-researched campaign, they could turn over their investment at a much higher velocity. As it is, they will have a higher opportunity cost by cutting corners, but that is often the only option. It is an option that you may be able to deliver.

Even when the cost is not the biggest hurdle, putting money into an online marketing campaign is a damn scary proposition for many companies. Even when and if they can swing the money, they will dip their toe in to check for sharks before they go swimming. It is frequently not the best option, but it is a popular option. Again, it is an option that you may be able to deliver.

Note: Sharks are my friends, and whales are my clients. The other fish are looking for you. You like fish, right?

People probably ask you a lot of questions about this industry. You will sometimes need a third-party resource to help make your point. I am happy to help you ease their tension, and to help them make better decisions. My blog is always here, and there is a lot of useful information in my archive. I don’t even want a finder’s fee to send paying customers your way, or to help you explain the benefits of SEO or social media marketing to your customers. Not at all, because if you have a small budget to work with, the last thing you need is to spiff me with money.

I love spiffs, but I prefer to pay them rather than receive them. Reference my article earlier this year titled “SEO and Social Media Reward: $5,000 for Introduction“. Yes, I really do prefer to pay you a $5,000 finders fee than for you to pay me a hundred. I am a money-spending madman like that. 😉

The Caveat … Yes, The Fine Print

The first thing to do is add your comment here on this article.

Of course, I don’t just want every cockroach in the Twinkies dumpster to hold out their hand for a free crumb. I want to hear from people who actually have a quality value proposition. The big catch is that for each person with their hand out, I will be watching. Yes, I will be looking at you, and judging you. I intend to provide a small degree of vetting. If I like what I find, I may put a spotlight on you in a follow-up article.

Because we are talking about people who looked to me for help, I am not about to mess up my reputation by referring them to somebody who will rip them off. I will watch my server logs to see how much and how long you have read my work. If you have been reading, and if you have subscribed, it is far more likely that we share similar principles. I will also notice if you have been a blog troll or lurker. If you are a non-communicating type of person, start communicating, and stop hiding in the shadows if you want my referral business.

Very Important: I will notice whether you are honest with your comment, and with your communications elsewhere on the Internet.

I welcome you to add your comments to explain your value. Feel free to spam all you like. If you seem spammy to me, I have a delete button for that. I tend to react pretty abruptly to people who annoy me. For example, don’t even think about commenting with your favorite keywords in place of a name. I am looking for people … real people with real names … who want more business.

The upside of my offer is that if you are legitimate, I would like to help my readers with appropriate options, and for us to possibly work together for mutual benefit. I am serious when I say that I want quality people to refer small project business to. If you are good and honorable, we may work together a lot in the future.

I have assembled a phenomenal team for producing massive success, but there never seems to be enough marketing talent to trust with the smaller projects.

I would also ask that in the event that you are ever over your head, that you consult me. You may find that you have enough resource to help that whale of a client after all.

Other Cost-Related Articles
Although it may seem hard to turn away a client only because of their budget, there are minimums I simply don’t work below. For more thought-provoking articles on the cost of SEO and social media marketing, and perhaps help with explaining cost to your clients, I offer the links as follows:

Photo Credit:
Broken Piggy Bank by Images_of_Money via Flickr

Marketing ROI Factor: Are You a Client or a Customer?

Planning is a Critical Marketing Component
Planning is a Critical Marketing Component

I often ask people what they want to achieve in their business. Much of the time, they really don’t know. I ask questions relating to the sales volume of their industry, the volume they want to achieve, the market share increase they seek, and what they are doing, or willing to do to reach those things. It gets me a lot of blank stares and long pauses on phone lines. This is because they really don’t know.

Many companies don’t have goals, or even the right information to understand what goals are achievable at a given level of marketing effort. They don’t know what it will require to get the results they want, and many times they are entirely shut off to finding out the frightening truth of where they are and where they are headed. When this is the case, they simply do not have all the pieces of marketing math and science in place to make good decisions that will optimize their success.

Relax! If you don’t feel like reading right now, at least push the play button and listen to the audio version. I think you will gain something from this.

If you are a marketing professional of any decent calibur, you surely understand this, and deal with it all the time. You will appreciate this story, and wish for each of your customers to understand this. Otherwise, if you are a business person who is not involved in marketing, I will explain why you need to pay attention to your marketing people and stop trying to butt heads with them over things you don’t fully understand. If you don’t understand something, you should work with your marketing people to make things more understandable, and know this: Marketing professionals do a much better job when they are not getting roadblocked by you standing in your own way. They also perform much better if you are not having chest pains over every decision and over every nickel and dime. So, it is best that you pay attention and use what they know to your advantage. That is what they are there for!

The market information I mention here is not intuitive for most people. It is the data that a marketing director or consultant can deliver for you, digest for you, and provide continually updated measurement. Tragically, it is often overlooked when somebody chooses to kneecap the marketing department because they don’t understand the work we provide. It is important to have this information in order to build your strategy, or it will be much harder and usually impossible to achieve optimal results. If you overlook these fundamentals, you are building on a weakened foundation. It makes perfect sense, right? Fine, maybe not yet … so I’ll continue.

Without accurate information about market potential, a defined set of business objectives, and a clear knowledge of what it will take to meet your well-planned goals, a marketing campaign is often little more than an experiment in wasting money. Marketing should never be a “shot in the dark” like this, but I see it very often that this is the way companies, large and small, approach their market. It leaves little wonder why some companies view marketing as a risk, while others understand the sound investment it really is. When this miserable fate of marketing fear gains control, companies suffer in huge ways. The common cause is lack of research and planning. The common outcome is that somebody makes an executive decision to slow down the marketing train and pull it off the tracks.

When Return on Investment Goes Negative

Positive return on investment (ROI), is the magical part of marketing that keeps a business steaming forward. Sometimes companies accidentally stumble on a positive return on investment. After all, even a broken clock is right twice per day. When the return on investment comes without good planning, it is often just out of “luck”, and that “luck” runs out. When it is based on yesterday’s market information and yesterday’s strategy, a similar drop in ROI can be expected.

If you have encountered this in your company, let’s look at this again and reevaluate the importance of marketing. Marketing is what makes companies successful. Without good marketing, many phenomenally great companies have failed. Conversely, many presumed failures have become successful because of good marketing. There is a strong correlation in the outcome of a company and the quality of their marketing. Not just quantity of their marketing … I said quality. This requires providing your marketing people the resources they need so they can deliver what the company needs.

Marketing provides the math that runs the machine, and has a huge influence in everything from determining the right selling price of goods or services, to the CEO’s salary. It is a lot more than just advertising, branding, or updating your Facebook status. When marketing is done right, it is approached as a holistic strategy to make the company stronger and more profitable.

Notable Considerations: Starbucks was a little coffee company and Subway was a little sandwich shop in the beginning. Because they understood the principles I am expressing here, they have become some of the most successful companies in their fields.

Call for Marketing: A True Story

I received a telephone call from an existing client. Actually, he is more like a customer, because he thinks like a customer and creates his own roadblocks like a customer, which is unlike a client. I consider customers and clients two entirely different things.

Let me explain this: In my business, clients view me as an integral partner in their success, and not just a person who completes a series of tasks. They understand that my knowledge and experience is what brings them success, and not just my performance of a set of prescribed deeds. They pay attention, and they take my advice very seriously. Clients don’t tell me what to do about their marketing … they ask me what to do about their marketing.

To be a client, a person cannot nickel and dime their way through and stumble along an undefined path until they make it. We set goals together based on solid facts and market data, and we adjust them as needed. We create a finely polished plan and we work together to make that plan a success.

So, about the person who called me, I like this guy. He has been a customer for about four years, and we have built a relationship in that time. I consider him my friend. He has been to my home, and he has met my family. We are not strangers, and we have a mutual trust. If he says a check is in the mail, I trust him (unlike this example from Suture Express). I believe that he trusts me, too, but he gets in his own way. He likes to be in control, and he likes to prescribe specific marketing tasks. That is fine, because if he has less than optimal results, it is ultimately not my fault. On the other hand, it kind of makes me feel a bit dirty and icky to just do what he says when I know he is making a mistake.

The troubling part is that when I explain why he should be doing something differently, the train gets derailed. It is not really because he does not have faith in me. As I said, he has been to my home, and he has witnessed first-hand that I am more than just a little bit successful in my field. What I have determined is that he has a hard time putting faith in his own plan … because he doesn’t really have a plan. He just knows he wants to make more money, but he refuses to take a strategic approach, regardless how sincerely or logically I urge him to do so.

In our recent discussions, he has explained that he wishes to market a product that he believes in very much. The product is in one of the most competitive industries in the world, and includes a line of very exclusive products with a specific market that is typically affluent. I asked him the common questions, and he does not yet have all the answers. What he could tell me is that he wants to hit the market at full strength. In his own words, he wants to put 100 percent into the marketing effort. When I told him that he had better prepare to mortgage his oceanfront home, his boat, and his first-born son, he probably thought I was joking.

Let me insert a bit of fact so that you can really understand this. My customer recently experienced a common fate as his employer of 20 years sold off his division to an overseas company and he became jobless. Because of his age and his specialized experience, he decided to avoid the underwhelming job market and take a new focus. He has chosen to sell a line of products that he and his wife’s other company has had some success with.

My friend and customer is an accountant by trade. In fact, he is a damn good one, who has been charged with accounting for a whole lot of millions of dollars by a sizable corporation. He has his Master’s degree in accounting and I believe he has done a great job with it. He is not a marketing professional.

His idea of putting “100 percent” into the new business venture was still expected to be manageable with a budget of under $10,000. Ten thousand dollars?! Can you even imagine that? His goal is to replace his full-time income of a senior accountant of 20 years with an investment of less than a month’s income. If that level of investment success was possible, don’t you think McDonald’s, Wal Mart, Microsoft, and Google would have already cornered that market?

So, in order to try and keep his perception of risk low, I introduced the idea of a partnership of sorts, whereby I would provide marketing on a contingency basis. I would not have done that if I didn’t have a degree of faith in his idea, and trust for him as a businessman. I also normally do not provide such a service with woefully under-capitalized companies, or those which are unwilling to listen and take good advice from an experienced consultant.

What I realized, as I considered this a little closer is that such a partnership is really not a good idea for me, simply because of his unwillingness to understand the importance of marketing. After all, the emphasis of his new company is nearly entirely based on marketing. Instead, I will offer him the opportunity to prescribe a set of tasks, pay me as a customer, and tell me how he wants to handle his marketing.

The way it turns out, he mostly believes that the emphasis will be in the production of a really great website and some social media exposure, but gives little thought of what else it takes, and what else I know. He wants me to produce his ecommerce website development, initial search engine optimization efforts, and set up a social media presence. The four-digit budget will be exhausted long before I can complete these tasks at an optimal level, but since he is a great guy and existing customer, I will stretch my work out beyond his spending cap. I will do a an exceptional job for him, and I will not let him down.

My customer’s chosen direction will leave no room for strategy development, data acquisition, customer modeling, industry market research and forecasting, or the many other things which need to be done to create a successful market penetration. However, it will provide a sense of control and security for my customer. He will fall far short of what he could achieve if he actually could bring himself to put forth a 10 percent effort, but I cannot tell somebody how to run their business. My job is to tell them how they could run their business, what they could achieve, and help direct them there. As for the 100 percent effort he talked about … he has no concept of what a 100 percent effort looks like in a competitive market. He has only seen that in movies.

Summary: You Cannot Save Your Way to Prosperity

If you approach your market like the customer I have described, you will miss a lot of potential. In fact, it is a good recipe for failure. A reality of marketing that is difficult for many people to grasp is that you cannot save enough money to become prosperous in business. To become prosperous, you have to invest it, and do so with good direction and dedication.

I like the way Thomas Jefferson put it with the inspiring quote as follows:

“The man who stops advertising to save money is like the man who stops the clock to save time.”

–Thomas Jefferson

Don’t just take it from me, look at your own company. If you are investing wisely in your business, you know that I am right. On the other hand, if you are trying to save money in order to keep your cost low, your profit is undoubtedly much lower than it could be, too.

I shared my description of what I call a client versus a customer. The question that I really hope you can answer for yourself is which makes more sense in your business. Would you rather be a client or a customer?

Other Related Articles: I believe that a lot of shortsightedness comes from fear of loss overcoming hope for gain. The fear of loss is often due to the cost of doing things right, versus just doing things. Here are some related articles you will appreciate if you liked this topic.

Applebee’s Review Explains Why Companies Should Care About Online Reviews

Applebee's Served This Tough Old Cow!
Applebee's Served This Tough Old Cow!


Do people complain differently online than they do to your face? In most cases, you bet they do! Let’s have a look at why that matters, and how you can turn bad online reviews from a frightening fact of life into a benefit. First, here’s a short and relevant story from real life. It is my online review of Applebee’s Neighborhood Grill & Bar in Topeka, Kansas.

My wife and I worked very hard through the week. I am a web guy, and she is Owner / Chef of Mad Eliza’s Cakes and Confections … working hard is what we do.

After a long work week, we decided that our kitchen at home was closed for the day. Without deciding on a destination, we packed the kids in the car and headed out for dinner. As we drove down what I would describe as “restaurant row” in our town of Topeka, Kansas, we decided to go to Applebee’s. We figured it would be a quick place to eat, with something to suit everybody from ages two to 39. We had not been to an Applebee’s restaurant in a long time, but it didn’t take long to realize why.

Perhaps I would be a lot harsher if I had not waited ten days to write this, but I’ll be generous to say that they did a fine job with the ice water. As for the steak, it was absolutely without a shadow of a doubt the worst piece of meat I ever saw on a plate. It was as if Applebee’s purchasing department found the toughest cow in the pasture, put it on a treadmill for a few months to get rid of any tenderness or flavor, and waited for it to die of old age. Then they took the sick joke even further and sent it to my local Applebee’s, cooked it to a charcoal briquette and put it on my plate!

Note to Applebee’s: When a guy orders a steak “rare enough that a good veterinarian could bring it back to life”, and specifically asks for it cold, that means you don’t cook the damn thing into jerky!

That’s enough about the poor old cow … but how about that “baked” potato? It was cold … the way I asked for the steak. I could barely even cut it with the knife they gave me, and I am not exaggerating.

I hesitate to give an accurate Gordon Ramsay style critique, but mostly because I don’t want to curse that much on my blog … on a Monday. So, I made a video montage of Chef Ramsay to do the cursing at Applebee’s for me.

My wife suggested that I tell them about it, but I said … “I’m not going to be one of those people.” Of course, I followed it up by whipping out my phone, taking a photo, and saying “Nope … I’ll blog about it.” I am always looking for real-life experiences to blog about, so this opened the door to a topic of online reviews, and what could be better than a restaurant to demonstrate?

I don’t enjoy the personal confrontation, and I am not alone in this. Besides, if Applebee’s is running the kitchen that poorly, I can only imagine what kind of people are back there … and what they would do to my food if I told them they had done a bad job. Have you ever seen the movie “Waiting”? Here … watch this video Why We Use Online Restaurant Review Sites to see what I mean.

Online Reviews Demonstrate How Customers Complain After They Leave

It may be easy to imagine that customers will exaggerate a complaint in an online review more than in person. There are surely instances of this, but the frightening reality is that people are often just being more forthright with their feelings of frustration.

It is easier to complain without company representation there trying to defend something that, as a customer in the heat of the moment, may seem indefensible. This holds true for both online and offline communications, but many people have come to expect less defensiveness from companies in online communications. One reason is because the company knows other people are watching, and another far worse reason is because the company is not watching.

Have you ever tried to complain to somebody who just didn’t seem to listen, or who did not give you the response you hoped for when you did complain? If you have ever encountered it, you surely know how aggravating that can feel. It is like an act of passive aggression, and it adds fuel to the fire. That is exactly how online complaints tend go, when companies are not listening. Here is the Wikipedia definition for passive–aggressive behavior:

Passive–aggressive behavior, a personality trait, is passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following through with expectations in interpersonal or occupational situations. It is a personality trait marked by a pervasive pattern of negative attitudes and passive, usually disavowed resistance in interpersonal or occupational situations.

It can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible.

Online Reviews Are Not Just for Consumers to Read

I find many instances of companies afraid to acknowledge their online reviews. I have heard people say things as absurd as “we cannot do anything about a negative review anyway” or “what if we respond to a review and people don’t like it?”

Being both a consumer, and a marketing strategist, I hope you can imagine how this makes my hair gray. What about the concern that these are customers who want to be heard, and deserve to be heard? What about the outcome if companies don’t respond … can they really somehow believe that people will like that any better?

Reviews are great for consumers. They may present their review as a compliment, as constructive criticism, or express their anger to a company where others can see it. In each case, they present opportunities for a company to come out better than before.

In some instances, a customer may just feel that their complaint is too petty to deliver in person, or they don’t feel like the outcome will be worth even the least confrontation. Of course, there is also the matter of hunting down and waiting for the right person to best direct the complaint. Have you ever waited for a manager in a store or restaurant, or waited on hold to tell your story? People really hate that, but online, there is no waiting to say your piece, and there are often other consumers there to cheer you on with a rant. This is especially the case if the company is not responding, or responds poorly.

An Upside to Bad Reviews

Even in the event of a dispute or a harsh criticism, there is a great opportunity to improve people’s opinion. Dispute resolution provides many chances to let people see your company in a completely new light. If you handle online reviews well, the opportunity for gain is even greater than offline communication. Then again, so is the loss … so it is important to get this right! Give it some thought before you react. Consider how others may feel. Whatever you do, don’t bury your head in the sand and act like you never saw it. That is pathetic, and that’s will just add fuel to an already destructive fire.

Try to look at it this way: Complaints are a customer’s way of giving you a chance to regain their faith and make them happy. Ignoring them is not the right answer.

I have just one more thing to add, before I leave you to write your comments and share this with others. Here is a closer look at that disgusting steak and potato that Applebee’s served. It does not quite look like the one in their menu.

Steak from Applebee's Neighborhood Grill & Bar, Topeka, Kansas
Steak from Applebee's Neighborhood Grill & Bar, Topeka, Kansas


Addendum:

At the “brilliant” urging of a commenter, Lori Smart, I decided to add a copy of my receipt from this visit to Applebee’s. After all, as she said, “there is no record at the location’s management that you were even a customer there”. Here is that record, complete with the server’s name.

Applebee's Receipt
Applebee's Receipt

Here is a photo of my three kids across the table from my horrid Applebee’s steak. After seeing that nasty piece of meat, my dear little Madeline had to force a smile through the fear. 😀

Murnahan Kids at Applebee's
Murnahan Kids at Applebee's