A Few Words About Blog Trolls and Lurkers

Yes, it is Personal, Damn It!
Yes, it is Personal, Damn It!


I have been thinking about this topic for a long time. I tried to keep my inner voice to myself, but if you have read my blog before, you surely noticed that my inner voice has a bullhorn. I say what I think. I have said it before that “I do not try to please everybody, and that pleases some people very much.”

Call me a crusty old bastard if you like. Worse things have been said before, and you will not hurt my feelings. I only get my feelings hurt by people who care enough to create a meaningful dialog with me, and make a relationship. I welcome them to my table, and I will share my blog feast with them any day.

Conversely, trolls can have the corn preserved on the other side of my digestive system. Regarding lurkers, I kind of think of them like zombies. I am not sure if they have thoughts and feelings of their own, because they refuse to reveal them.

So what about the blog trolls and lurkers? I could take this examination to all new heights, because I know trolls, and I have enough lurkers to fill the Mariana Trench! Rather than drawing this out with a lengthy psychological analysis, I will just heave a heavy-handed slap in their direction and let you rip them a new one with your comments if you feel up to it.

Blog Trolls: Read the Sign!

Blog Trolls Read the Sign
Blog Trolls Read the Sign
Trolls suck! I have read multiple new blog articles that touched on the topic only yesterday*. Blog trolls are the bane of a blogger’s existence, and they insult our hard work.

Trolls leave pithy comments on blogs, and drop their website links in attempts to boost their ranking in search engines at the expense of hard working bloggers. Some trolls are out to cause an argument or to harass writers for missing a comma or spelling somtheing inkerektly.

Blog trolls don’t have any meaningful input, and they are just out for themselves. Some companies use blog trolling as their core online marketing strategy. If you want to see how “brilliant” that plan is, read about Ray Skillman.

REF: Ray Skillman, Indianapolis Car Dealer Review: Bad Social Media and SEO

Blog Lurkers: You’re Missing the Whole Point!

When a blogger sits down to write about something, they are trying to communicate with you. They usually want to open a conversation with you, and they value your input as much as their own. It is how we learn together and often build meaningful relationships.

Two way communication is a basic concept of blogging. Collaboration is not something the doctor does when he lifts your gown and tells you to relax. It is a way for a community to enjoy the benefits of more than one mind.

Blog Lurker Bank and Trust
Blog Lurker Bank and Trust
Bloggers often work very hard to research and produce something that is useful or interesting to you. Yes, you, and not the person standing over your shoulder reading your screen.

People often treat elections this way, too. They just assume that “the other people” will vote. In case you have not noticed the state of politics in this world, that is not productive thinking. It is not productive in politics, and it is not productive in blogs.

If you just suck up a blogger’s knowledge like free grape soda, without so much as nod of approval, or giving something back, don’t you feel just a tiny bit ashamed? Are you the kind who will walk up to the cash register at a convenience store and grab every coin in the “Take a Penny, Leave a Penny” tray?

Didn’t your parents ever tell you that it is nice to share, and that keeping everything to yourself is not polite? Oh, and seriously, do you really not think we bloggers see the 18 minutes you spent reading three articles, and then come back two days later to suck up another 43 minutes of our hard work? Yeah, we see that, and we know you are there.

We appreciate that you appreciate us, but why don’t you at least say “hello” and introduce yourself? I mean, we are your free labor, often doing the research that saves you countless hours of frustration. You could at least throw us your two cents between our long working shifts.

Trolls and Lurkers Say “Who Me?”

If you think this is directed to you, you are right. I am writing directly to you, whether you are a blogger, a blog troll, or a lurker. Until you take the initiative to introduce yourself to the other readers of any blog, you are missing the best value of blogs.

Sure, you can sneer at me and think I am an ass for saying what millions of other bloggers feel. I cannot speak for all bloggers, but this will cover a majority. We are working hard for your benefit, and what you failed to notice is that the greatest value comes to those who participate.

Maybe you think we get paid for this. Some bloggers do, but most are doing this to share good information above all. Some have advertisements to help cover their cost, and some blogs are there to promote a brand. There are many good reasons to blog, but most blogs are produced to be helpful and thought provoking, regardless of any other motivation.

For example: If you think that I write about SEO and social media marketing just to sell you something, consider this: If I sold my services to any more than one in 50,000 readers, my services would suffer, and I would be too busy to write this blog. I am not here to fool you, but rather to help you. If I get the benefit of a new client, or a little respect for knowing my job well, that seems pretty fair for both of us.

Don’t ask me for pandering, undue compliments, or to fluff your Teddy bear and pat you on the bum. Heck, just search Google for how to polarize an audience, and there I am … in your face! If you want somebody to tell you how it isn’t, go somewhere else. I will tell you how it isaccording to Murnahan, of course.

* Blogs referenced above addressing blog trolls:
What Makes A Blog Awesome? by Mark Harai
Bring IT! What Are Your Blogging Pet Peeves? by Ingrid Abboud

Photo Credit:
No Pooping by johannal via Flickr