influence marketing Archives - Page 2 of 4 by Mark Murnahan

5 Spam Tactics Good People Use to Kill Business Efforts

I am being pretty generous by using “spam” and “good people” in the same line, but I am trying to be forgiving. As surprising as it may seem, there are instances where otherwise good people will do spammy things which tarnish their business hopes. I don’t mean the canned meat, SPAM®, either. I mean the spam that happens when people try anything to get your attention.

I view spam as a desperate attempt to be productive while using counterproductive means.

When I say that it is an otherwise good person, it is often simply because they don’t know any better. They get confused by so much hype about the Internet, and end up doing spammy things that tarnish their business hopes, and hurt their chances for successful business communication.

Spam Tactic Number One: Company Names

It may seem innocuous to use a company name instead of a human name, but there is a time and a place for each. You may think this is subjective, but the numbers have come in, and if you are making this mistake, you are very likely hurting your odds.

Regardless what some flunky want-to-be “expert” may have told you, if you are not communicating explicitly on behalf of a company entity, it is best to use your human name. Even in those cases when it is “all business”, if you will be accepting any feedback, you should include your name. You know … the one your parents gave you.

An instance of this spam offense which has come back to hurt thousands of unwitting businesses is creating a Facebook Profile under the company name, but then having it deleted for a Facebook terms of service violation. Why would Facebook delete a profile with a business name? The answer is easy … because they should have been using a Facebook Page. If you don’t know the difference, or just how much it matters, you would be wise to read “Facebook Profiles Are Not For Business … Facebook Pages Are!”

You may argue the perceived benefit of using a company name in place of a personal name all you like, but before you get too set on your opinions, you may want to read an article titled “Social Media Profiles: Keywords, Company Names, and Humans“. It will explain how some of the best researched companies in the world are handling the matter. If you think that using your company name as a replacement for your given name is a good idea, think again!

There are many instances when the brand of a person is far more important than the brand of a company. Sometimes the company name adds authority to the person, but it is even more common that a person adds authority to the company. Heck, in my instance, only a small percentage of people I communicate with are aware that I am CEO of a successful decade-old wholesale Internet services corporation. The ones who need to know (customers and potential customers) are very aware. It shows up on their bill.

A real person with a human name will win the hearts and minds of people over companies every time. Many successful corporations know this, and prove it to be true.

Spam Tactic Number Two: Being False

Claiming to be something or somebody else is just asking for trouble, but it happens all the time. It is more common in personal communications than in business, but it happens in business more than you may like to imagine. This is done in many forms, but I will classify it as “Hot Chick Spam”.

I recall a specific instance of a beautiful lady (or “hot chick” if you prefer) whom I quickly realized was not what she claimed. It was a man who used a name and photograph of a beautiful woman instead of his own, because he was sure that more people would listen to and buy from a good looking woman.

There are certain word patterns, even in short Twitter messages which can give away even the best lies, as well as other obvious discovery tools. In the instance of my “hot chick” example, it only took a moment to figure out that it was a man, so I looked up the website owner with a WHOIS lookup and made a phone call. As I expected, when I asked to speak with the woman from Twitter, the truth came out really quick!

He got over this absurd plan for success once I pointed out how easily he could be exposed. His company also ended up hiring me to handle the search engine optimization for a highly competitive million+ page website. No, will not tell you who he/she was … under any circumstances! What I can tell you is that their business communications are far more legitimate and far more effective now that the company is represented by real people.

Spam Tactic Three: Spammy Blog Comments

If you have a blog, you surely get spam comments, but did you know that some people actually think it is a good strategy? This spam offense aligns with the previous two, but it goes further, and it can become a very destructive tactic for the spammer and the blog owner alike.

This is What Blog Comment Spam Looks Like to a Blog Owner

This spam tactic is generally executed by using industry keywords (or a company name) in place of a proper name when posting comments to a blog. Since those keywords will then be the link text pointing to the spammer’s website, it is assumed that it will be great for search engine ranking. It makes sense, right? If it could only be so easy, don’t you think everybody would do it? Then it would just be a battle to see who could produce the largest amount of spam. Actually, that does pretty well sum up this kind of spammer’s mentality, but they are so wrong, and they kill their chances of success like you may never believe! Search engines are simply not this stupid.

Ironically, this particular tactic was also previously implemented by the company I mentioned in “Spam Tactic Two.” In their case, they had paid some guys in India to write thousands of pithy blog comments including their website links. They got some extra website visitors out of it, but not the paying kind. When their website was brutally punished by Google and other search engines, they were ready to jump out of a third story window. You know … not really committed to death, but definitely upset enough for a jump.

If you think that something may be spammy, it probably is. I recently replied to this kind of spammer, and he actually answered back saying that he was not a spammer. My answer to that was as follows:

I am glad you responded. I just figured it was pretty unlikely that Mother Business Card and Father Brochure actually came together and decided to name their little beloved one “Logo Designer”.
REF: SPAM or Not SPAM? The First Test is Your Name!

Many people agree with my view of blog spammers, but apparently some people still don’t grasp the downsides.

Spam Tactic Four: Follow Me!

There are many obvious examples of this spam tactic found every minute of the day on Facebook and Twitter. It is commonly expected that having a lot of people “follow” what you have to say will matter. But guess what?! Those people who are quick to follow you without a good reason are also likely following about a squillion others just like you. They aren’t paying close attention and just waiting for the right time to send you a wallet full of money. They are usually just following you so that you will follow them back. You know, because that way you will both gain some amazing authority.

The truth that is hard to drive home is that more is not always better. I have given examples of this more times than I can count, but people usually have to make their own mistakes before they learn.

It stunned me how many people thought it was a useful action-list when I wrote a completely smart assed article titled “How To Become Popular on Twitter Without Actually Being Useful“. Apparently a whole lot of people missed my disclaimer that stated as follows:

“If you follow this list without deviation, you are sure to become massively popular. Just remember that if anybody says “I hate you and hope you die a miserable death” or “You deserve a really bad case of herpes” … those people are just jealous because they will probably never be as popular as you.”

It does not always have to be an extreme overstatement or effort to be spam-like. If you want people to follow you just to feel better, try buying a feather … they tickle, too!

This obese woman selling weight loss has offered to help me build a huge following on Twitter. — Obese Woman Selling Weight Loss

When the “Twitter Follower Frenzy” or “Facebook Please Like Me” epidemic gets to be so desperate as this obese woman selling weight loss and trying to tell me how to grow a huge Twitter following, it is a clear failure (click the image to enlarge). Note: She has six people following her. Perhaps she meant something else when she said “huge”.

If tweeting and facebooking to a large number of people who do not care about what you have to say is really so useful, how are you measuring that success? Is it in the bank?

People who fall into this addictive need to spam more disinterested people will be better off measuring the cost of their missed opportunities from all that wasted time and energy. If you have fallen prey to the disease, it is time to regroup and get some help to develop a better strategy.

Spam Tactic Five: Shooting at Innocent Bystanders

Trying to reach everybody, instead of a targeted audience is really the widest use of spam. Do you remember how I defined spam as a desperate attempt to be productive while using counterproductive means? Trying to reach everybody is about the worst conceivable spam of all. It not only wastes the time and resources of the spammer, but can create a lot of other possible business communication side-effects.

A Lot of Ammunition is Good, But Sharper Aim is Better!

Before trying to market something, it is important to remember that “everybody” does not want what you offer for sale. “Everybody” is not a target. Lack of focus is the most costly mistake any company can make in marketing, and is often the biggest missing piece in a failed campaign.

The task of targeted marketing using customer modeling based on demographics, psychographics, and propensity analysis really does make the difference. You can count on it!

If you target the right people, and stop shooting blindly, you will no longer need to reach all of the people. The right ones will do the “heavy lifting” for you. When others are promoting your virtues on your behalf, it is no longer spam … it is marketing.

Spam Tactics and the Ignorant

Sure, anybody can be guilty from time to time, and sometimes a small degree of spamminess is just an accident. Ignorance does not mean a person is stupid, but simply that they don’t know any better.

I know that some people will try until their last breath to defend these atrocities. That would be easier than admitting to making huge errors. Maybe they believed a bad pitch from an ignorant marketing agency, or they believed the fairy dust that so many people are promoting each day about Internet marketing.

Sometimes it is the company itself that is the perpetrator of the spamminess, but even more often it is because they trusted the wrong people to handle it for them. I have encountered many companies that believed a crooked marketing consultant, without ever caring to understand whether their tactics were sustainable, and an overall strategy was never even a consideration.

Once the pain sets in, it is too late, and they end up paying somebody like me a whole lot more money to fix their mistakes. That is, to fix the mistake of their prior ignorance.

An even more tragic result is that many companies will keep trying to do the things which do not work, just because they refuse to listen to good advice. When their marketing isn’t working for them, they assume the whole thing just doesn’t work.

These are the people I call the willingly confused. I generally try to be forgiving and patient with them, but those are not my strongest traits. The reason my patience often fails is not because of ignorance, alone, but rather the apathy which so often comes along with it. When you throw a dose of apathy on top of ignorance, the ignorance is sustained because they don’t care enough to overcome it.

Without apathy, ignorance is much easier to fix. When people care to do better, and to know more, ignorance fades with each thing they learn. If you know somebody going down this path, you will be kind to warn them.

Photo Credits:
No Pooping by johannal via Flickr
World Cup Babes Australia by gnews pics via Flickr

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Make it Harder to Leave, But Increase the Odds That You Will

I was just looking at my lawn, and it inspired me. Yes, it sounds silly, but hear me out. I will tell you a story, and maybe even plant a seed or two about getting the most from your life … starting now!

I want to pose a thought of how one of the famously noted “Seven Deadly Sins” can be effectively used, in moderation, to improve your business and personal life.

This is a story of taking inventory of life and business, and I hope you will use it for your benefit. First, I will explain why I took a closer inventory in my front yard this morning.

Back in late 2008, I became a reluctant participant of this thing we have called “economic recession”. Yeah, I am one of those CEO fellas who screwed up the whole economy. I was whacked hard and fast when multiple of my suppliers laid off thousands of employees and dropped some of the services I provided to customers. It was not anything within my control, and not my fault at all. A lot of jobs were lost, and a lot of pay cuts were handed down. Being heavily invested in my company, I took the biggest hit. In fact, I accepted it with pride, because I helped a lot of other people’s ships sink much slower.

Before the untimely meltdown, I lived in a very unique way. I was sitting pretty, just months from a young retirement. I enjoyed an amazing family life, with everything set to focus on being a full-time husband, daddy, and race car driver.

I pranced around in a custom built home with 5,000 square feet, that was perfectly ready to fill with babies. I enjoyed new Corvettes, Hummers, Jaguars, Escalades, fancy artwork, custom motorcycles, limousines, first class vacations, kickass clothes, and … you know, the whole ten yards. Sure, the common saying is “the whole nine yards“, but I added a few feet. Heck, I didn’t need credit, but I still found some good reasons to send over $50,000 per month to credit card companies. Yeah, I know … fifty grand per month … insane, right?!

I was feeling pretty proud of myself as I was living large, but not because I was living large. I did a fine job, and I became helpful to a lot of people. I turned out far better than my teachers expected when I left school for the last time at 15 years old. I had come a long way from the challenges of my youth. That feeling of pride was what got me moving, and kept me working harder. Yes, feelings of pride really can create a lot of drive in a person … keep reading.

In the big shuffle, I realized that there was a huge emotional backlash. It made things a lot more stressful, and I started losing the happy-go-lucky skip in my step. I was working more hours than before, and even more than in the earliest years of my company.

Something I saw then, and work hard to see each day, is possibility. I saw the possibility to grow, learn, and do more. I even took the initiative to write a few books, and a squillion blog posts about good marketing.

So, let me tell you something I learned along the way, and that I revisited this morning.

How You Feel Means a Lot!

I have observed that an incredible amount of potential comes from feeling good about yourself and the things you do. Sure, there is a list out there of “Seven Deadly Sins“, but I think one of them is a tool which is instrumental for success, if used in moderation. The one I considered early this morning as I looked at my lawn before the sun came up is “Pride”.

Feeling proud of yourself, your products or services, and who you are can create monumental changes in your life. Knowing that you are doing good things for good reasons helps your subconscious mind to discover ways to keep doing it, and doing it better. Feeling good, and being positive is not just some silly hype that motivational speakers sell. It really does matter, and this is something I want you to think about.

I moved to a smaller home in 2010, and I cut back on the fancy lifestyle. Although some would still call me “Mr. Fancy Pants”, my pants are not nearly as fancy as they once were. I used wisdom, and some regret, while downsizing my life during the recession. There were many things, like my racing career, that took a back seat. A lot changed, and in case you ever wondered, you are not alone if you saw some changes, too.

Even after those changes, I still have a fantastic life in many ways. I have a wife and three kids who give me great pride. I am better at my job than ever, and I feel very proud of what I do to help businesses grow their market.

It may seem absolutely silly to you, but something that got me to thinking about this is looking at my lawn as the seeds I recently planted begin to sprout and turn green. It was a matter of pride that inspired me to plant that new seed this spring. I decided that even in a smaller home, with a smaller yard, I still wanted to make my scaled-down piece of awesomeness a bit harder to leave when it comes time.

Yes, I actually did stand in my driveway this early morning, look back toward my home, and realize something very cool that I feel is worth telling you. As uncomfortable as it may sound, I’ll bet you have some seeds to plant as well.

My Questions to You:

This “lawn moment” of mine really made me wonder about you, and what you are doing, and how you feel. So, I have some questions for you, and I hope you are not too chicken to answer them … at least to yourself.

What has given you pride in your life or your business that has been neglected, and that you could resurrect?
What little things will you notice today which inspire you?
What “seeds” can you plant to help bring you closer to things you want?
What seeds are you planting today?

Yes, this is still a blog about marketing, so don’t get confused. If your answers to these questions have anything to do with growing your business, I want to remind you that the best time to sow a seed is long before you want the plant. Don’t let fear or lack of pride get between you and a greener lawn. Take pride in your work, and spread it with others around you. People really will notice, whether it is a boss, an employee, or a customer … when you have true and sincere pride, it will show.

Waiting for greener pastures, or looking over the fence at the neighbor’s grass will not help unless you are prepared to get started now!

That’s my marketing message for today. Just as I said in the title: “Make it Harder to Leave, But Increase the Odds That You Will”. I am doing that with my home today, just as I do with my business. I may soon leave here and move on to bigger and better things, but if I don’t make it a little harder to leave, and nicer to remember, then I am not doing all that I can!

Are you doing all that you can?

I hope that you will reflect on this with sincerity, and if you know somebody who can benefit from taking a better personal and/or business inventory, do them a favor and share it with them.

Photo Credit: Grass by Ian T. McFarland via Flickr

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Business Evolution and Crash Test Dummies

Take just a moment and reflect on how your job evolved. Whether you are a business owner, manager, or just working your way up the totem pole, look at your career in a snapshot. It is uncommon for a career to move smoothly along its initial planned path, from start to finish. A business entity is no different in this respect.

Companies change a lot over time, and if the business evolution is just right, people are happy. The world is perfect, and you can look out your window to see pink unicorns kissing adorable puppies on the forehead. Business evolution should always be so perfect, but then the human resources department would have the additional job of giving out hugs instead of layoff notices; accounts payable would cheerfully add a bonus for the utility company; and the accounts receivable department would send chocolates with every delinquency notice.

Since career and business are usually not perfect, many disheartened people will give up managing the evolution of their company and the direction of its travel. They end up going for a ride like a crash test dummy waiting for the impact.

Hop in and Ride With Me

I am a huge fan of analogies, and I also love cars and driving, so I am inserting my loves here. Hop in and let me take you for a drive through the typical evolution of a business as it navigates between “point A” and “point B”. Don’t worry, I am a trained driver.

I hear from a lot of businesses struggling to define the path between where they are and where they hope to be. I gather a lot of observations as I listen to these companies, and I uncover many commonalities between them. This helps me to build better strategies. Most of the people I talk with feel like they landed themselves in an industry and with a job title that was at least a few miles away from where they began, or where they expected. This goes for people in every level of a business, from the very bottom to the very top.

It all seems to “woosh” by in such a rush for a lot of business people. Whether you own your company or not, whomever it is who signs your paycheck has probably experienced that same “woosh” effect. So, let’s examine some factors which significantly put on the brakes during the evolution of a business.

In this business evolution, I want you to think about where you find yourself today. I suspect you will find yourself cruising somewhere on this road, either as a driver, navigator, or passenger. Many businesses begin as somebody who found a passion for something, or a perfectly timed opportunity, and grew an idea from a spark into an ember, and eventually into a flame. Now we have the combustion engine … an engine to help move us down the road to where we want to go.

Will the Driver Keep Their Head on the Crash Course?

Fatigued Business Drivers Fall Asleep at the Wheel

Along the road, a business founder usually ends up doing a lot of driving. A small company, and most are small at first, will often begin with somebody acting as the sales, billing, accounts payable, reception, public relations, marketing, and “something else” person. The “something else” is the part that the business is about, whatever it may be … accountant, electrician, car dealer, home builder, surgical supply company, real estate brokerage, cigar shop, or whatever it is. The “something else” is that cargo in the back that we are driving to deliver.

At the start, the company is fueled based on the skills, passion, opportunity, and funding of that same “something else” person at the wheel, and not based on all those many tedious jobs to fill. As the business gains a little momentum from all of that exhaustive work given by a person or small group of people, many of those jobs are delegated properly to others who are fit for the position. They each get their seat in the vehicle that moves the business.

If all goes well, navigators will be reading the road signs and updating the business plan, the business budget, the marketing strategy, and keeping the business driving in a good direction of growth. Much of the navigation lands in the driver’s seat with a tireless owner or manager who has great navigation and driving skills. They drink a lot of coffee to remain alert, and they seldom take their eyes off the road.

I know that it must seem almost impossible, but what happens if their vision gets blurred? What if they get a bit too distracted, or just too familiar with their day to day commute and they relax at the wheel? I’ll tell you what happens, because I am frequently like the dismayed highway patrol officer who arrives on the scene when the vehicle is already out of control. Of course, nobody appreciates me for writing them a citation, but they expect me to be very compassionate when I pull their kids out of the wreckage.

The initial passion, funding, and opportunity of the drivers with the “something else” is usually not enough to safely navigate the business through the winding road and beyond the inherent roadblocks. Even with their eyes fixed on the road, if they let go of the wheel for a split second, the whole trip becomes a big wreck. Many businesses crash with no more than a driver and a passenger or two, but if they made it beyond the earliest road blocks, they may have a bus full of dead crash test dummies.

Fear of the crash is why most people will never own or manage a company.

Killing the Crash Test Dummies

Screeeeeeeech! Slam on the brakes! The business is all of the sudden sliding out of control, and going in unpredictable directions.

The business plan, which was once the road map, is frequently forgotten while the company is still driving down the same road and on the same mission as it was yesteryear. Somebody forgot to budget, so the bills are just being paid as they come in the mail. Marketing strategy? Well, the marketing strategy is to sell as much of this “something else” stuff as possible to put enough money in the bank to cover all of those checks that keep going out.

Many drivers will loosen their seatbelt, ignore the squeaking brakes, and let the fuel gauge needle dip a little too close to the “E” before checking the map for a gas station. They forget to take good advice from employees and other influencers, and begin to treat them like crash test dummies, instead of as the great assets they represent.

It sounds like a pretty nervous way to do business, right? Would you be totally shocked if you found similarities to this in your company? If you are nervously looking in your mirrors like a single occupant in the carpool lane, or grabbing your safety belt like a bus driver with bad brakes, you are not alone. Many companies of all sizes operate this way, and they overlook important steps to better business evolution. Careless driving is one of the biggest killers among businesses.

The most common factor is that the people with that special “something else” let the map fly right out the window. This happens periodically throughout the lifespan of nearly any company. In fact, it may surprise you to ask other business people around you when the last time they thoroughly reviewed and updated their business plan, their budget, or their marketing strategy. This may not apply to Fortune 500 companies, but they often don’t have it just right, either.

Arriving at the Crash Scene

How this came to me today was in a very common exchange with a company manager trying to navigate for his company. He wants his company owner / driver to stop at a gas station to get some racing fuel, instead of just driving along with a dirty windshield. The driver has not crashed in ages, but that is never a good excuse to let the insurance lapse, or to stop using a seatbelt. It not only goes against the laws of business, it can cause a mess for all of the passengers (employees) and bystanders (customers).

The managing navigator flagged me down as the highway patrol because he wants to report his boss for careless driving. In this case, the owner opened the business with that same passion and timely opportunity as others. He has been lucky to navigate well without a map, and with bald tires for years. Since the time he settled into his driver’s seat, his risk of a crash is increased exponentially. His windshield is dirty, his road is filled with potholes, and the other drivers are speeding by him and pointing at his seatbelt dragging on the ground outside his door. Worse yet, he fails to let his backup driver take the wheel when his eyes feel tired.

I am here to check the driver’s license and insurance of this owner / driver, or otherwise to help his top navigator to get in his own car and drive away. The manager is so dismayed by the owner that he is hesitant to continue presenting good ideas. The owner is so accustomed to just going along for the unplanned ride that the manager feels like he is in a crash test, too. It has forced him to decide whether to buy into the company, or to start his own.

Running a business well means maintaining the vehicle, keeping the drivers and navigators on the right road, and so many other things. The hazardous but common truth is that many business drivers will take better care of their car than their business plan, budget, and marketing direction. Instead, they have just stumbled upon a road by chance and circumstance and driven the best they know how with the vehicle they landed in.

Most business people are not good at every aspect of running a company. Even fewer of them properly address the value of efficiently delegating tasks to professionals, especially with marketing strategy. They mostly just know the things they picked up along the road during the journey with their unique “something else” that their business is about.

If you know somebody like this, pass this along as a reminder that other “dummies” are counting on them for a good trip. I am not telling you the perfect navigation for every journey on the highway. I just want to remind other drivers to look up from the steering wheel enough to read the road signs.

What do I have to do with this? My job is to isolate the squeaky parts, find the right mechanics, train the driver, buckle in the passengers, supply the road map, change the tires, and pour racing fuel in the tank. I guess you could call me the marketing crew chief.

I will leave you with this compelling crash test video. Give it a play and consider your driving safety while you prepare your comment to tell me what you think.

Photo Credits:
IIHS Crash Test Dummy via Wikipedia
Dummy Heads by Greg Westfall via Flickr
Dummies in a Cage by Brad K via Flickr
Ford Crash Test by Rian Castillo via Flickr
Sierra Sam (hanging dummy) via Wikipedia

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Social Media and The Absurdity of Implied Reciprocity

If you are one of those people who expect social media favors because somebody owes you something, just stop it! If you like something and find value in it, share it with others or do whatever it is that you do with good information. Just don’t assume that it means people owe you anything.

In business, and in life, reciprocity is a wonderful thing. It feels good to do business with people who do business with you, right? You have probably heard the old saying, “You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours.”

A problem with reciprocity comes when people start doing things they would normally not do, only in hopes of demanding favors in return. It is nice to reciprocate, but this does not mean it is implied.

I received a message on LinkedIn yesterday that read as follows: “Hi. I liked ur PAGE through LINKEDIN GROUP. Expecting ur LIKE and SUPPORT.” I thought to myself, “Really? You liked my page in order to add to my number of people artificially interested in my work and you want me to do the same? Oh, and ‘SUPPORT?’ Does this mean you want me to feed your kids, too?” I guess I just didn’t see that as any kind of favor.

If you like what I do, and you think you could learn something from a guy with over 20 years of successful marketing experience, by all means, “Like” my Facebook page. If you think you have done me some great favor and I am going to do you a favor by liking your Facebook page which has absolutely no interest to me, you need me worse than you think!

Why would you have any desire whatsoever to have me “Like” your Facebook page if I will never, ever, be a customer or recommend you to anybody because you are a a demanding douchebag who expects something from me?

If You Like Me, Just Like Me, But Stop Expecting Favors!

Rather than to rewrite the whole thing, I want to share something I said in a previous article titled “Do You Tweet and Retweet Seeking Favors?” Here is the closely paraphrased version:

People in the social media field often build relationships in which they will work together to spread a message. As long as there is honesty and integrity in the message, I am generally happy to help. However, I have been hit over the head with some of this recently. It seems that I get a lot of requests to scratch somebody’s back. It is all fine and good to be reciprocal, but is it good to take away the human filter that makes us who we are?

If all I was doing was tweeting, retweeting, blogging, Facebooking, YouTubing, Digging, Stumbling, and etcetera, because I hoped people would return the favor, would people still care what I had to say? I do not imagine the answer is “yes”.

Reciprocity Has Its Place

Don’t get me wrong, reciprocity certainly has its place, but if you are doing things with expectations of others doing things for you in return, don’t you at least think it should be something meaningful or useful?

The only time I recall actually being a little hacked by lack of reciprocity was from a car dealer. Hell, I purchased three brand new Corvettes and a Cadillac Escalade (total cost over $240,000) from this guy in under a year’s time, and I sent him many new customers. When he went to somebody else for his web hosting because it was cheaper than my recommended $209 per year plan, I kind of thought that was a bad business decision. Then when he asked me about a new website and used my website proposal to shop around, I wanted to kick him in the nuts. Yeah, I kind of felt slapped in the face, but I will still buy a car from him based on the merits of his business … not mine!

I Did Not Buy These Just to Sell a Website!

In summary, don’t “Like” my Facebook, subscribe to my blog, follow me on Twitter, link to this page, kiss my butt with kind comments in my blog, or anything else of the sort if it is only because you want something. Do it because you know I am not full of crap and because you receive value from my hard work.

I may reciprocate, but not because I feel guilty if I don’t.

I have just one more thought for you, and it is what my wife said when I mentioned this subject to her. Here is another way to look at it, and a brilliantly performed song.

Note that since I wrote this, I have replaced the Bonnie Raitt version of the song. Apparently she stopped allowing her YouTube videos to be embedded in web pages. this guy performs it nicely, too!

“I Can’t Make You Love Me“

Dog Photo Credit to wsilver via Flickr

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Anybody Will Sell You Stuff: Some Will Ask “What About You?”

Listening Builds Friendships ... and Companies! — Listening Builds Friendships
... and Companies!

Let’s consider a trait that we can each benefit from, and most of us should work harder to achieve. I will tell it in personal terms, and then explain how it applies to marketing a business.

I am sure you must know somebody who makes you feel comfortable to talk with about anything you want to talk about. When I find myself encountering this rare-as-a-unicorn person who just wants to know about me, and the things I want, it almost feels awkward at first, but in a uniquely good way.

I am talking about those people who listen attentively and do more than just nod their head and yawn as you ramble, while waiting to assert their agenda. I mean the kind who draw you in and make you feel totally comfortable to want what you want, think what you think, and be who you are. You tell them things, because they actually show their interest in you.

When you encounter this type of person, it is easy to feel that their story has got to be a great one. Their expressed interest in you has made them more interesting, and it makes you want to know them better, and to hear their side. Suddenly, there is a desire to switch things around and make the conversation more about them, what they want, what they think, and how you can be a better friend to them.

I hope that you have had the privilege to know somebody like I have described here. If so, you are probably nodding and smiling as you think of the way it makes you feel about them. It may even make you want to ring them on the phone to catch up on things since you last spoke.

Applying Listening to Marketing a Brand

Think about how you feel in a scenario where a person really cares what you have to say. I don’t mean the kind who fake it, but rather the kind where you can sense a sincere interest in you. Don’t you want to be more like them?

Have you ever encountered this feeling that you are talking too much and listening too little? All of the sudden you feel a little bit like a conversation hog, but it is so hard to change. When you want more business, you have to talk more, and it becomes hard to remember those listening skills.

This “listening person” we all enjoy is often there, in the back of our mind, but they are very hard to emulate. What I described is a common dynamic of any relationship, but the special ones we think so kindly about are simply better at it than we are.

In business, we each have our agenda, and our sets of rules for what we think is the best outcome for our own interests. We plan things in ways that we will get what we want out of the relationship, and deviating from that plan is a threat. It is simply against the rules.

In marketing, it is very popular to be the one doing all the talking, and nod and yawn while customers try to tell us what they want. I see extreme selfishness every day in marketing. I see it most profoundly online, because it is easy for companies to scream louder when they think that nobody is listening.

It is important to notice when our set of rules and a selfish mindset diminishes our potential. This is a common outcome when we forget to listen and be that person who becomes more interesting simply by being genuinely interested.

Consider for just a moment the instances when it may be best to approach business as a bit more of an interested introvert, and less of an interesting extrovert. It may create a chance to reset your objectives and become a better “friend” to your customers. The outcome will often be that you will become more interesting, and others will think kindly and smile when they think of your business. The good news is that this truly is scalable to any size of brand!

Are you taking enough time to ask people “What about you?” I guess we could call compassion and listening matters of “growing up” or “wisdom”, but I believe that we can each do more to cultivate our listening and caring skills.

How can you better address the importance of listening to what people want? Will you do the necessary research? Will you take that extra time to slow down and get to know what people want and expect of you?

What do you have to say about this? I welcome your comments, and I want to know “What about you?”

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