US Airways Consumer Scrutiny
I just read a blog article about a poor customer experience with US Airways. It got me to thinking about the ways we listen, and I think it could be described as two different types of ears.
Consumer Listening: Skeptical Ears
The first type of ears are those of a skeptical consumer. We have skeptical consumer listening skills which are pretty basic and instinctive. These are the ears we use to hear scandal and negativity. Most people have this set of ears cranked way up to hear anything they need to know as a consumer.
Consumer watchdogs are everywhere, and social media brings them out in a big way. In fact, it allows each and every one of us to be a consumer watchdog and to tell our story. Anybody with a bad experience can make a pretty loud sound using social media.
Consumer Listening: Marketing Ears
With a different set of ears we hear the marketing message of a company. We turn the sensitivity of those ears way down. These are the ears we use to hear all of the good things that a company does, and the reasons we should buy from them.
As a test of your ears, just consider it this way: Do you hear me better when I say that I want to provide you with my valuable SEO and social media marketing services (and I do), or when I warn you about ways you may be screwing up your SEO or social media marketing? You see! Your instinct is to hear what could hurt you, more than hearing things that can help you. This is why it takes so much more effort to spread a good marketing message than to spread a negative message about a company.
We have all heard that it takes many “rights” to correct a “wrong”, but what if you could turn the “wrong” into a “right” of sorts?
Turning Up the Marketing Ears
There are a lot of ways to turn up people’s marketing ears and help them to hear you. Ironically, it can sometimes come from whispering into their other set of ears … their skeptical ears. If you are running a business and somebody is talking about your brand, you should be listening to the negative and even using it to your advantage. I see it all the time that companies are either not paying attention, or they hear negativity about their brand but do not address it. They just hide their head in the sand like an ostrich and wait for things to blow over. What they often overlook is all the potential for benefit they may be missing. They see it only as damage, and often try to ignore it in hopes that it will go away. The truth is that it is not going away, and ignoring it only serves to cause a sense of passive aggression. It often makes people want to scream even louder about their distrust or discontentment.
US Airways Best and Worst Scenario
What if US Airways hears this message of discontent about their brand and ignores it? It means that they will further lose faith from this consumer, and also that of others he encounters … both online and offline. On the other hand, what if US Airways used it as an opportunity to regain his faith? What if they were able to improve his opinion of US Airways and even come to make him a fan of their company? Can you imagine the value of turning it completely around and showing a disgruntled consumer that you really do want to make them a happy customer?
I suspect that the disgruntled US Airways customer, Jeff Gibbard will soon have answers to whether US Airways is listening. In the meantime some skeptical consumer ears are perked, and just waiting for US Airways to whisper.
Update: 14 June at 7:30 p.m. USA Central TimeAmerica West is Listening
I would like to add thatĀ America West Airlines, which is the same company asĀ US Airways (they merged in 2005) has been here and did nothing! They gave no reply, and made no attempt toĀ apologizeĀ to Jeff Gibbard or even give an excuse.
Here is a screen capture from my visitor log which clearly shows that this article is visible, even to the noisy airline industry.
Turning away business from a customer with a fist full of money and a desire to buy what you sell may seem like a bad business tactic. For many people, turning away a customer is viewed as a tragedy, but in some cases it can produce great benefit. In fact, there are many instances where this tactic can be extremely profitable. I know, it sounds crazy, but let me explain. First, I want to be clear that this is a tactic versus strategy, so don’t start trying to make a bunch of money turning people away just yet.
Examine, for a moment, a couple of reasons it can be important to turn away business, and how it may benefit your business to do so. Face it, not all customers are great customers. There are bad customers in every business … yes, I said every business. Even if you own a coin operated vending machine company and never have to face the customer, there is such a thing as a bad one. There are ways to turn away business that are tactful and useful, and sometimes we just have to learn when it is right to say “no” to the customer.
What brought me to write about this today was that I recently expressed selectiveness to a friend who is in need of marketing services. It is not a matter of arrogance at all, but in my line of work, there are very good reasons I absolutely must turn away business. I only have a limited amount of time to render my services, and if I am spending time working with people who do not pay well, have a bad product offering, or are difficult to work with, I may as well stay in bed. Working with a client for the money alone would be miserable to me, and likely to them as well. Mine is an extreme case, but in every service industry role where time, creativity, and knowledge are the product, it is very important to seek the right customers and stop wasting time with the ones who hold us back. Turning away business can be a painful transition for those unfamiliar with the concept, but it can save a lot of grief.
Opportunity Cost
(economics) The cost of an opportunity forgone (and the loss of the benefits that could be received from that opportunity); the most valuable forgone alternative.
When you are striving to be profitable, you must consider opportunity cost. That is the cost of opportunities that you will miss by taking on each customer. Any time you take on a new customer, there is a loss of potential opportunities elsewhere that could slip by because you are too busy.
In good and proper business transactions we can see that the customer is just as fortunate to make a purchase as the seller is to sell their product or service. If you focus on a better value proposition, competition really does not affect you as much. I have created many instances where a client raises their prices because their offering is worth more than they realized, and they were able to qualify it in their marketing message and quantify it in their business volume. This is the way it is supposed to be, after all. If somebody is willing to trade their hard-earned dollars, the seller clearly has something they want or need. If it is something with a limited supply and a sufficient demand, turning away business is sometimes not just the best option, but rather the only option. That is basic supply and demand, but there are still other reasons to turn away business.
The Arrogance of Purchasers
As purchasers, we often do not see things clearly and we become arrogant with our spending. There is always somebody else out there willing to sell things as if they are a commodity even when they are not. These sellers will offer something that is inferior, and price it low enough to capture the business of those who cannot understand the value difference. What this seller often misses out on is longevity and sustainable profitability. They do not understand the notion of turning away business for any reason, and the value it represents. This sort of selling as a commodity affects most businesses at some point (either internally or externally), and it is important to address it in your marketplace. In service industries, especially, it is a tragic end for many companies to fall into the trap of selling as if they are a commodity just to keep doing business … profitable or not.
Commodity
A commodity is a good for which there is demand, but which is supplied without qualitative differentiation across a market. It is fungible, i.e. the same no matter who produces it.
A valuable lesson for both buyers and sellers is to recognize when something is not a commodity. Seeking qualitative differences is important to good purchasing, and conveying these differences is an essential of good marketing.
Overcoming Commodity Selling
I write what I know, so I am using examples from experience in my own companies to illustrate my point. Perhaps if you see that I live by my own advice, you can at least view it as sincere. When I consider people selling something as a commodity that is indeed not a commodity, it is easy to find examples. Let’s take web hosting as an example (the service that keeps websites up and running). I have been in the web hosting business as a wholesale web host selling to hosting resellers for a decade. Is it the same thing anywhere you go? Well, without a long drawn out explanation, I can say that it clearly is not a commodity. My company’s web hosting prices reflect the millions of dollars invested in higher quality equipment and network architecture that sets us apart. We turn away a lot of business, and thank goodness, because it allows us to keep the quality standards extremely high for the customers who want something better.
Is SEO a Commodity?
Another absolute case of a non-commodity that is often sold as such is marketing and search engine optimization (SEO) services. I see people every day who sell dreadfully ineffective but cheap marketing and SEO services. Tragically, I find many people in the marketing and SEO field who will drop their prices to try and compete as if they offer a commodity. In my line of work as a marketing consultant and enterprise SEO, it is pretty clear to me that my clients receive more quantitative benefit from the transaction than I do. Maybe you have a similar case of providing great value as well, and if so, it is best to recognize it. Sure, I get to earn a good living, but the dollars the client gets in return far exceed what I am paid. It kind of makes me like a money duplicating machine to clients. Would it make sense for me to take on every project that comes my way? Of course not, and especially considering that much of my profit is derived from performance-based contingency SEO. So I refuse to sell it as a commodity, which is why I turn down the vast majority of potential clients who approach me. It is stupid? Some may say “yes”, but my clients are fortunate for it, and my reputation has become valuable because of this.
Do You Want Cake or Do You Want Cake?
I also see the benefit to turning away business very clearly in another of the companies my wife and I own and operate, in the cake and confectionery business. It is a very busy time of year for cakes. There are a lot of weddings, anniversaries, and graduations this time of year, in addition to the constant baby showers, birthdays, company parties, and etcetera. Designer wedding cakes and custom gourmet cupcakes require a lot of time, creativity, and skill. If we tried to take on every customer, it would degrade the product for all customers. So we turn away business to keep quality standards high. This makes it better for business on both sides, the customer and the company.
If you are not selling a commodity, it is unwise to try and compete as if you do. There will always be somebody willing to cut their own business throat to beat you out of a sale just to drive revenue. Discovering and conveying your value proposition is essential. Sometimes that means that you will need to start turning away business.
When I think of all the things I do to improve client’s search engine ranking, it is enough to make a non-SEO and non-geek’s head spin. It all gets so complicated and geeky that there should be no wonder why many SEO will not shake your hand unless there is money in it.
Today I want to offer you a fast, free, and easy to understand list of actions you can take right now to improve your search engine ranking in under one hour. I don’t mean an hour per day, an hour per week, or an hour per month … one hour, and that’s it. Then you can go back to doing things you enjoy. I even broke these steps down for you in maximum increments of ten to twenty minutes, but none of them should take you that long to complete. That is, unless you don’t want to take my word for it and you need to do a whole bunch of extra research to see if I just made this all up to trick you.
This is not intended to be an all-inclusive list of SEO tricks and tips to put the SEO industry out of business (I still want to earn a living, after all). This is just sixty minutes we are talking about here. Sixty minutes that will count! So, here it is … a list of six ways to improve your search engine ranking in under one hour. Better yet, it will only take you a few minutes to read this.
Add a link to your website on LinkedIn. LinkedIn can provide valuable link relevance for your website that search engines will recognize. If you do not have a LinkedIn profile, set one up right now. It will take less than ten minutes, and it will be worth it. It is simple, and even if a squillion people do not see it, search engines will, and they will follow the link to your website, thus improving your authority with search engines. This goes for many other social networking sites as well, but the clock is ticking and we only have an hour to get through this list.
If you already have a LinkedIn profile and you have your link on your profile, that is great. You are not off the hook, though. Update your LinkedIn status with a link to a compelling page of your website that others maybe have not already seen, and that search engines may not have not already seen. You can automate this process with a service such as Ping.fm or others, which offer updating of multiple services. Update each of your social networks with the latest content from your website, unless you are ashamed of it and you want to keep it a secret.
Improve Search Engine Ranking, Minutes 11-20: Google Profile Links
Add a link to your website from your Google Profile. If you do not already have one, it is very simple to set up, and the value of the links on a Google Profile are fantastic. They may not look very fancy, but Google Profiles are a good place to be sure your links are present. You may add multiple links, and I suggest adding some of your top priority links that you want people or search engines to notice.
In case you are not familiar, here is my Google Profile and you can create your Google Profile here. If you do not already have a Google account, the setup is simple, and it offers many other tools, but we are keeping this under one hour.
Improve Search Engine Ranking, Minutes 21-30: Link to Social Media Profiles
Create links to your social media profiles from your website. This not only allows others to communicate with you more closely, it will add link relevance to your social media profiles, which already link back to you. You may think that social media profiles all come pre-built with link authority, but it is not entirely true. Some seem to be valuable almost from the beginning, but others can use a little help. Linking to them will boost their link relevance (which you should want anyway), and when they link back to you the wonderful circle is complete. Don’t worry, it does not need to be as elaborate as my list of social networks, but your website should link to some of your most used social networks.
Your social media profiles already receive link relevance from outside sources, and you probably already made certain that your profiles are relevant to your business. Whether your business appears in searches by way of a social network or to your site directly, you still win. You win even bigger if they are cross-linked, sharing and boosting authority for the same topics. This is making sense now, right?
Improve Search Engine Ranking, Minutes 31-50: XML Sitemaps
Create or update your XML sitemap. Since I want to keep non-geeks from going googley-eyed and falling asleep, I want to explain that this is easier than it sounds, and is important to help search engines index the contents of your website. XML sitemaps are not the kind of sitemap that people use to find their way on your site. They are a kind of sitemap which is used only by search engines.
If you have a WordPress blog (as many millions of people do), simply add the massively popular Google XML Sitemaps plugin to your blog. It is a free plugin, but it is definitely worth a donation to Arne Brachhold for his efforts and your time saved. Roughly 3.8 million people have downloaded this plugin, so don’t be silly and say that it is way too hard to use.
If you do not have an XML sitemap because your antiquated website does not generate sitemaps automatically for you, then use an online sitemap generator to crawl your site and create one for you. Once it is created, simply upload it to your website and then add it to your Google Webmaster Tools. Yes, you already have this, because you have a Google account. You were paying attention to minutes 11-20 above, right? Great, then you already have a Google account, and you can follow the simple directions from Google about creating and submitting XML sitemaps.
I gave you 20 minutes for this one, just in case you need it. The clock it ticking, and you can do this!
This assumes that you have an existing RSS feed, but even if you do not, you can create RSS feeds and still get a lot done within this hour. Create a Feedburner Feed, and do not skip this part, because it is a big one. It will only take a tiny little bit of your time, but it is extremely valuable. You can create a Feedburner feed here. Just look for “Burn a feed right this instant” and enter the link to your feed (usually something like http://awebguy.com/feed).
The links from a Feedburner feed are quite valuable, and since it is suggested that you link to your RSS feed from every page anyway, it only makes sense that you should link to a feed with all the SEO usefulness of Feedburner. Plus, if you have great information to share, odds are good that you will also benefit by having people subscribe to your feed, which is the more obvious reason for Feedburner. See my Feedburner feed for aWebGuy.com to see what the feed looks like. It allows users to subscribe by email or RSS, and there are many Feedburner options that you may tweak later. In fact, the email subscription forms on my blog are Feedburner subscription forms. We are going to keep this under an hour, so for now let’s just be excited that you will have those awesome links pointing back to your website from Feedburner.
Improve Search Engine Ranking, Minutes 56-60: Blog Comments
You now have just four minutes left, so let’s make these count in a big way! I want to preface this by saying that you should never, under any circumstances spam a blog comment form. It is a huge point of contention among bloggers and it is very rude to the blog owner. At the same time, it is not only very acceptable, but also very appreciated by bloggers (me included) when readers leave their productive or considerate comments. It does not have to be a perfectly crafted work of art, but it should be relevant to the article.
You may be shocked to know the value of your comments on a reputable and popular blog. When you add your URL (web address) where it is asked for in a blog comment form, it creates a link. Somehow between absurd rumors that “nofollow” links do not provide great value in search engines and people’s hurry-up, scan-and-click way of Internet life, the tremendous link value of a blog comment is often overlooked.
Although I would discourage focusing on blog commenting as a cornerstone tactic in your SEO efforts, adding your comment to a blog post can greatly increase your website link authority over time. Doubt me if you like, but you read this far, and there is surely a good reason you found this article. This blog has significant link authority (see SEOmoz mozRank), and if you comment with courtesy to my blog and my readers, your link will be right here for search engines and people alike to follow.
If you finished the list early, the next big step would be to create some website content that is worth sharing with others on social media and social bookmarking sites. When people share a link to your website because you provided something useful to them or that they think will be useful to others, it is extremely valuable to your search engine ranking. (Hint: Something like this article. ;-))
Enterprise SEO Sounds Great: But What is Enterprise?
I often find myself visiting with everything from small emerging SEO clients to mid-market SEO clients and large enterprise SEO clients. A commonality I find is that each of them have a hard time justifying the initial cost of SEO services, but I want to help explain how they are able to do so. In each instance, there is a clear understanding that they need SEO. After all, it is what makes them visible to more people searching to buy what they sell. Let’s not get silly and start questioning whether SEO works or not.
We surely all know that SEO provides an excellent return on investment when it is done just right.Ā If you don’t know this already, there are a squillion solid case studies to back it up. If you are reading this, you know very well that it works. I wrote this and SEO’d it for you, and now you are here to read it, so let’s not be coy. You want more people to see your brand and your value proposition, and this is something that enterprise search engine optimizers do well. The challenge lies in how to justify the stroke of a pen that puts your money into the SEO’s bank account. So let’s look at that and consider how everything from the enterprise SEO service level all the way down to a “let’s fail fast and get it over with” marketing budget is justified.
What is Enterprise SEO?
Let us first look at the term, enterprise SEO. What does it really mean? Somehow the word enterprise has been used to define an elite level of businesses that spend a lot of money on marketing and have thousands of employees in huge skyscrapers. Let’s put that definition of enterprise to bed right now, and start looking at this a bit differently. I like the definition provided by Princeton University which states as follows:
Enterprise: “a purposeful or industrious undertaking (especially one that requires effort or boldness)”
Using this definition, it seems more obvious how we can categorize SEO and create a description of “enterprise SEO” as opposed to other SEO … call it “hobby SEO” or maybe “wasteful SEO”. This is because, as the definition describes, it is a “purposeful or industrious undertaking”, which is too often not the case at all with SEO. I often witness huge errors when the initial cost of SEO overrides the value of good SEO. I mean, let’s consider this: If you are shopping around for search engine optimization services, are you likely to look for the SEO with the highest cost, or the one with the lowest cost? If you do not recognize this as an absurd question, you should. If low cost is the biggest deciding factor, you have it all wrong. Instead, I want you to imagine seeking the search engine optimizer with a better strategy and a bid that you can justify to yourself, your company board members, your wife, or whomever you answer to.
Tragically, the initial cost of SEO is a big factor to a lot of people, while the “effort or boldness” part of the enterprise definition is devalued due to fear of loss overriding expectation of gain … even when it is substantiated with logic. I stand behind what I said in the article “Fear Affects Success in Marketing More Than Logic“, because I know from experience that it is true.
Common View of Enterprise SEO
Considering a common view of enterprise SEO, it is easy to imagine a team of bright and creative marketers gathered in a meeting room providing consultation to the big company’s internal SEO staff. They craft plans based on a lot of facts and figures, they meet repeatedly to define objectives, they strategize at great length, and they carve out a huge piece of marketing budget justified by real-world estimates based on known variables. Then it is time for implementation on a grand scale to put all of those great plans into profit-producing action.
Enterprise SEO starts to look really costly, but the risks also start to look smaller with all of that valuable data and planning. Most people agree that search engine optimization would be a whole lot easier to justify in this scenario of the enterprise-level SEO campaign. After all, it is no longer a unicorn hunting expedition or an elf-chase … it is a real-world Internet marketing campaign. Large enterprises like Amazon.com, Intel, Pepsi, and eBay would not spend all of that time, effort, and money if it did not improve their bottom line. An important question is how to bridge the huge gap between your efforts and enterprise-level SEO efforts responsibly and without waste?
Bridging Unicorn Hunting SEO and Enterprise SEO
A big difference between the large-scale enterprise SEO campaign and lower-level efforts is how far it is pushed to the point of diminishing return. Let’s look at the bell curve and understand that enterprise SEO strives to reach the top of the curve or a little beyond, while cautious SEO is generally at the very bottom of the curve before the big rise. In any market, and in any medium, there is a point of optimum value to the company. While many smaller or fearful companies are out to “test the water” with their SEO campaign, the bold and purposeful enterprise is pushing forward as closely to the point of diminishing return as possible with their SEO, and often just a little beyond it. All the while, the cautious company is often only reaching the beginning of the curve and wasting time and money. In the process of either instance, much efficiency is lost along the way. There must be a good balance, and reaching that balance is where SEO is most successful.
The reality is that either level of SEO includes largely the same processes, while one is a matter of taking it to a higher “enterprise level”. At the enterprise level, the data samples get larger, the depth of market research is greater, the manpower is increased, and the action steps are more defined, but it requires the same overall steps and makes use of the same or similar skills and tools. Most waste occurs by failing to optimize the optimization.
Too minimal effort with SEO is the most common problem I find with companies. When they barely reach the edge of the bell curve, it is easy to give up early and assume it was all a waste of time and money. This is all because it was not performed with the “effort or boldness” within that definition of enterprise.
I see it more often than not that SEO proposals are dreadfully flawed on the side of what appears to be caution. It seems so much easier to ask for a smaller dollar amount and present a low-cost (and therefore low-results) plan. The same problem is seen by companies going to a bank for a loan and seeking too small amount of money. They are often turned down because their plan is flawed by seeking too small of an investment. If you doubt this, just ask any Small Business Administration financial assistance person, accountant, or commercial loan officer about downsides of underestimating. Businesses trying to work with too small of dollar amounts are very often doomed to fail, and all because they equate less money with less risk. In the real world, it just isn’t this way. Thinking too small is a common precursor to failure. You can take my word for it and save yourself the trouble, or you can go down that ugly path of failure and learn the hard way. Just don’t ever say I didn’t warn you.
Enterprise SEO Means Less Risk
Companies of all sizes are more fearful than ever to implement effective marketing including SEO, because it requires money … scarce, elusive, and coveted money. So what often happens is that SEO companies, realizing their market, will give in and offer what companies say they want, whether it is the right answer for the client or not. In these instances, the SEO will address the client’s fears and misunderstanding about the business of search engine optimization, and capitalize on those fears by assuring them that even a minimal effort will do a lot to help. The problem here is that the minimized efforts often do not even begin the climb up the bell curve of successful market reach, and will leave the client disappointed by a lack of results. It is hard to call it an outright scam when it is what the client asks for, but it is hard to view it as ethical when it is not providing the best solution for the client.
Attempting to equate lower dollar amounts with lower risk is an easy mistake to make, but also a frequent cause of failure. Thinking bigger like the enterprise in the huge skyscraper is a good start. After all, every enterprise SEO client started somewhere, and they did not grow by thinking small.
It seems that the whole world is coming down pretty hard on BP these days. The company has been in a spotlight of bad press, but is all of the negativity really called for? I think it is time that we all take a moment and look at the bright side. Let us look at these reasons the BP oil spill is really not all that bad after all. I think we should go easier on BP and stop being so darn negative, so I have come up with a list of thirteen reasons we should give BP a break. In order to emphasize my points, I have included videos for your review and consideration. I also want to invite you to share your ideas.
Reason One to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: The Animals Were Dying Anyway
Those fish, birds, turtles, and other wildlife were going to die anyway. Nothing lives forever. Heck, most of these animals would just be eating each other if not for the oil spill. BP practically did them a favor. Who wants to be eaten?
Reason Two to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: It Was Not BP’s Accident
Just take it from BP’s CEO, Tony Hayward. As Mr. Hayward said, “It wasn’t our accident.” So there you have it. Get off their back!
Reason Three to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Tragedy Makes People Stronger
What does not kill you makes you stronger. Those people in Louisiana will thank BP someday. BP is just helping to toughen them up. Besides, they are providing alternate jobs to fishermen, and does anybody really like fishing? Why are these people so ungrateful? In the end, they will have more strength than they ever thought they would have. Didn’t Hurricane Katrina teach us anything? Some people called Katrina a disaster, too, but BP knows better.
Reason Four to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: The Spill Was “Relatively Tiny”
The explosion happened way out at sea. It is not like it happened in downtown Los Angeles. Besides, as BP’s chief executive Tony Hayward said “The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean.” In fact, he said this spill is “relatively tiny”, so why do people keep making such a big deal out of this?
Reason Five to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: It Got Grannies to Say “Friggin” and “Suck”
The Deepwater Horizon disaster got grannies to say things we may otherwise never see. I mean, how funny is it so hear an old lady say “friggin”. Is the humor worth nothing to you people?
Reason Six to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: All the New Jobs
It may have cost a bunch of oil workers their jobs, but look at all the cleanup, legal, and public relations opportunities it has created. See, and all this time you thought this was just a disaster.
Reason Seven to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: BP Makes Greece Look Healthy
Considering that the expected cost of BP’s oil cleanup and lawsuits far exceeds the amount of money Greece seeks from the International Monetary Fund, it should make us all feel better. After all, a lot of people are complaining about bailing out Greece, but it starts to seem like only a small amount of money when you compare it to BP’s upcoming losses.
Reason Eight to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Politicians Reveal Themselves
The Deepwater Horizon disaster helped to uncover where politicians stand. It often shows how stupid they are.
Reason Nine to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Diversion of Bad Press
BP chief executive Tony Hayward now has a worse approval rating than Barrack Obama, Sarah Palin, or Toyota. Somebody had to take the heat off. BP helped divert millions of eyes from other screwups. I mean, does Toyota really seem so messed up now?
Reason Ten to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: More Socialism for USA
This may not seem like a win for anybody with a sound mind, but it sure is a windfall for some idiots. With so many Americans looking for ways to become a socialist nation, this greatly expands opportunities for the government to run more business. Some have even suggested USA government seize BP the way President Harry Truman took over steel mills during the Korean War. With deeper roots into private industry … the oil industry … this could be a huge windfall for big government.
Reason Eleven to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Conspiracy Theory
If we never had something so extreme as oil spills or terrorist attacks, how else would we ever uncover all of the USA government’s plans to destroy the world and kill all its inhabitants through the decades?
Reason Twelve to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Fun With Nukes
Maybe you think it is silly, but just think about how infrequently we get to blow stuff up with nuclear explosions. Never mind any side effects, at least it could stop the oil spill. Besides, consider the great stories we could tell our grandkids about the three headed fish and how we saw it all get started.
Reason Thirteen to Give BP a Break About Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill: Tony Hayward Wants His Life Back
Tony Hayward just wants his life back. Shouldn’t we respect the wishes of such a powerful man, after all?
