LinkedIn Archives - Page 2 of 3 by Mark Murnahan

Social Media History Shows What Success is Really Made Of

History provides some excellent lessons. It frequently tells us what works, and what does not work. This goes for aircraft engineering, brain surgery, particle physics, and social media, too!

Don’t tease me for my aging view of this topic, because sometimes an old-timer may just have something useful to offer. I have been sitting here at my computer for many years longer than your average social media expert, guru, maven, evangelist, or whatever the kids are calling them these days.

I watched Yahoo rise straight out of the dirt where we planted our fax machines and ARPANET, and I used it. I used it a lot, and my friends did, too. We told people about it. Yahoo grew, and relationships flourished.

I remember the days shortly after some bright Stanford University students named Larry Page and Sergey Brinn launched a new website to help make better sense of the growing Internet. It used a sophisticated democratic process to reflect what people like. The voting happened when other people linked to your website, and that process is still used today.

There are a few people who will read this and nod with amusement and agreement, but a lot who will never imagine a scratched MP3, or their mix tape being eaten by a cassette player. If you mention 8 Track or Quadraphonic sound systems, they are lost without those clever Stanford students who had a googol-dollar idea and named it Google.

Old-timers used Google, too, and even long before “google” became a verb, we told people about it.

Whether you consider the examples of explosive growth of social networks themselves, or anything else that becomes successful online, there are some principles which always hold true. Yahoo, Google, Facebook, Twitter, and even cupcakes in Topeka, Kansas all have some things in common. They have each produced something that made people want to tell others about them!

“Webmasters” and Early Online Social Media

In those early days of social media, there was actually a job status of “Webmaster”. It described somebody who had a “mastery” level understanding of the Web, including hardware, network architecture, software, programming, design, data integrity/security, and website promotion. It eventually became too much for an individual human to withstand, and those Webmasters’ duties were appropriately divided into multiple departments, and job descriptions became more specialized.

The early days of “easy online success” faded fast, and before very long, anybody with a Yahoo Geocities account or a pre-installed copy of Microsoft FrontPage Express could tag themselves as the “Webmaster”. The first generations are the people who used to actually spell things without spell check, saw programming code when they closed their eyes, and who stuck their geeky necks out to create and share the Internet as we know it.

Even back then, we had people with exceptional social media talent. They told people about great new things, they shared useful information, and they used each of the things I am about to describe. We just didn’t call it social media, yet.

The Success Tools Changed … The Rules Didn’t

Maybe you don’t think of Yahoo or Google as social networks, now that you have Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, YouTube, Foursquare, Gowalla, and a squillion others, plus a squillion-squillion blogs, and an app for everything.

The way I remember it is that I met some of my best friends in Yahoo Chat Clubs, Yahoo Groups, and AOL. Yes … America Online. I met people from all around the world since back in the 1990’s, and we are still communicating on Twitter, Facebook, and the rest of the evolved social networks.

Relationships Thrived When AOL Launched AOL Instant Messenger

Meeting most of my closest friends online sounded crazy to a lot of people back then. It was crazy enough that when I started dating my wife in 2000, we were afraid to tell her parents how we had met. Eleven years, three kids, and a lot of computer upgrades later, we still marvel at the community we built using social media.

If you don’t already know my online career history, my résumé certainly shows that I go way back as a “geek”. During that time, I have witnessed many online success stories. I have been very fortunate to participate in many, as well. So, let’s look at what has been historically successful, and why?

Each of the online successes you have heard of, including Amazon, eBay, YouTube, Google, Yahoo, and etcetera, each had some things in common. The same things that made them successful are the things that create success today … every day. Allow me to share these observations.

Social Media Success Factor One: Usefulness With Convenience

Usefulness and convenience have a huge place in the history of social media success.

Back in the old days, and even more profoundly today, Internet users show a very finicky nature. As the Internet grew bigger, users realized that if they don’t find exactly what they want, immediately, they can find it in just a couple clicks. So being useful, convenient, and worthy of their attention has always been critical to success.

Imagine if Google required you to jump through hoops to get to what you are looking for. They knew better, so they made it as convenient as possible to enjoy their usefulness.

It really doesn’t matter what industry you are in, or what cause you are promoting. Whether you are selling cars, cigars, or surgical supplies, you must find ways to become useful. Being useful can mean that you are helping somebody learn about a topic, learn what they need to know in order to buy something, or just helping them with a hearty laugh to get through the day.

Being useful and convenient are imperative. I often watch whole industries miss this point.

Social Media Success Factor Two: Creativity

Creativity is natural for some people, but it can also be learned and cultivated.

In each of these historic instances of success, there was somebody … one person, who had an idea. They shared the idea with somebody else. Some encountered luck that they shared their idea with the right person with the right talent, but they all started with a single spark of creativity.

The people around the initial spark put fuel on it and blew it into a flame. The importance of creativity, and cultivating your creativity, should never be underestimated.

Talent is something that grows when you express it, and talent can have a huge cost. It is not easy, but if it was easy, everybody would do it. It is worth the effort if you are committed.

There are bright ideas sparking up around the world, every day. If your spark is not the brightest, it will be much harder to build a flame around it. When that is the case, the next step becomes even more important than ever.

Creativity Has Changed Since The Hampster Dance Debut

Do you remember Hampton and The Hampsters back in the 1990’s? They grew up and became more sophisticated!

Social Media Success Factor Three: Relationships

Relationships make or break social media success. The people truly are the most important piece of the big picture. Just as it happened in the days long before our exploration into Facebook Likes and Twitter retweets, people spread things they like and believe in. It happened this way with everything from religious and political beliefs to pet rocks and friendship pins.

This does not mean you need to make pals with everybody on the Internet. Social media marketing success is not just about making friends, but relationships are extremely important. When you communicate and get to know a few people who know a few people, it adds up. Those people who build good relationships often have things in common, including common interests and common thoughts.

If people like you, over time, they may begin to trust you. That can mean they trust your advice, your insights, and your motivations.

Relationships with people dictate a lot about the success or failure of anything in social media … on line, or the old school kind that happens around boardrooms, schools, churches, and elsewhere. The people are who decide if your spark will be fed, or die out in a flash. There are a lot of great ideas which meet the burdens of usefulness and creativity, but without good relationships, they usually don’t make it very far.

Sometimes the relationship is very loose and simple. For example, I wrote this, you read it, and maybe that is as far as our relationship has come so far. Over time, that may change. Maybe you will eventually feel comfortable to share this with others with your tweet, Facebook like, or reference it in your own blog.

The best relationships are a building process that happens over time … often many years. Trust can be improved upon and implied by longevity, but nothing really trumps good direct communications. Each relationship must start somewhere, so it is worth extending your hand. As relationships evolve, treating them like the treasure they really are is hugely important if you ever hope to encounter success.

By the way … if we have a good relationship, could you please tell somebody about me? I am currently looking for a new project to use my useful, creative, and relationship building abilities. If we don’t already have this level of relationship, my hand is extended. Please introduce yourself so we can get started.

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Social Media ROI, Marketing Cost, and the Willingly Confused

Social Media Sends Mixed Signals

Many people have a very confused view of social media, and I can understand why. If you just look at all the ways social media is used, there should be little wonder how people confuse the issues. Some of the most bewildering concerns I notice surrounding social media are the return on investment (ROI) and the cost of social media marketing.

Millions of the world’s businesses understand by now that an investment in social media is vital to their success. Tragically, many of the same businesses are generally clueless about how and why they spend money with social media, and how to optimize their spending for the best results.

These same confused companies are further complicated by misguided notions that social media is limited to, or primarily intended only for personal socializing. They are the companies who question why a business would use Twitter, because that is where people announce what they had for lunch, LinkedIn is just for job-hunters, and Facebook is where old high school friends swap stories. That is social networking, and networking is important, but it is only one facet of social media. If you confuse this, and think that social networking is the basis for social media marketing, you will waste a huge amount of energy trying to sell to your friends, and others who already know you.

Believing that social media is just for personal socializing is a costly absurdity. It is the kind of absurdity that some companies will only discover after competitors have stolen away enough market share to demand attention.

Because of a lot of confusion, some people will say that the return on investment (ROI) of social media marketing is difficult or impossible to accurately calculate. I don’t think that is the case at all. If you have the right variables, calculating the ROI of social media becomes just another mathematical equation. The trouble is that so many people neglect or overlook the measurable data that really counts.

Social Media ROI Causes for Confusion

A first step to calculating the ROI of a social media campaign is to have a clearly defined campaign. That means having a strategy in place, and not just a list of tactics. It means producing a plan with a set of measurable outcomes. It requires creating and collecting customer modeling data, and using that data to reach your target audience.

Read the Social Media Signals

I have read and participated in a lot of conflicting discussions and possible answers about social media ROI, and most of it is very inaccurate or misleading. Many people will intentionally leave it open for a lot of confusion. After all, if people are confused, it is a lot easier to charge them money for things that are of little or no benefit. Calculating the ROI of social media is actually very basic, but that’s not what the failed real estate agent turned instant marketer wants you to believe. If they can convince you to just wait a little longer to see measurable results, they get paid more. Because of ignorance and greed, the debate of return on investment may never end.

In order to try and bring a little more clarity, let’s address two huge variables.

Social Media Branding vs. Increased Sales

Two very popular considerations for growing a business using social media are branding and increased sales. The two should work well together, but let’s face it, a brand can be really popular and still have a bigger drain hole than spigot. Even the most brilliant branding does not always make the sales hose filling your bucket as fast and powerful as the money drain leaving your bucket. There has to be a balance in order for the efforts to be sustainable and valuable to the company.

I find it very common for companies to lean too far in one direction or the other in their goals and attempts for successfully reaching their market. Confusing the value and cost of branding with the value and cost of increased sales is often when measuring social media ROI becomes completely muddled. Producing a balanced strategy is simply not as intuitive as most companies expect.

Building your brand name is extremely important. It builds recognition, trust, and sets your tone among the many other competing brands. It does not always have a proportionate result in sales. If you doubt it, look at it like this: You have probably encountered many great brands via social media, while it still didn’t bring you closer to buying from them.

In many instances, building your brand recognition will seem like it takes on a life of its own. When it gets to a certain point, it will grow and change, even without your input. People will talk about you more, and they will pass along your virtues by way of social media. They share your brand on Facebook, tweet about your brand, and they will become an influence to your brand (if you are paying attention).

Now, what about building those social-media-induced sales? All of the touchy-feely great branding and kind words about you can still lack a good reason to buy from you. There are a lot of companies I really like, but I am simply not their target audience. When I know somebody who can benefit from those brands, I pass them along. The brand reaches their target through me, and others like me, who become their connectors to their ideal target audience.

This is a fantastic outcome, but let’s face it, it is not always as efficient or as easy to come by as you may wish. It takes a lot of effort, and a lot of brilliance to produce a sustainable and self-propagating level of branding. It is a highly effective strategy for long-term growth, but it is also a very ambitious and frightening marketing endeavor in the beginning. Thus, a need for a balance between short-term and long-term marketing strategy.

Social Media Marketing is Branding, Advertising, and Much More!

I believe that some of the worst points of confusion in social media marketing come back to what marketing is, or is not. Both branding (long-term) and advertising (short-term and long-term) are extremely valuable when they are done well, but they require very different measurements to accurately calculate their respective ROI.

Which Way is the Right Way?

Companies often skip steps in their marketing, and then wonder why it is not measurable. This is especially common in smaller companies, because it is nobody’s full-time job to understand, monitor, and measure the company’s successes in this area. Instead, a lot of companies will try and “wing it” by assigning marketing tasks as an add-on to other job descriptions.

This is most profound as it applies to social media, but often because the people actually writing the checks have never had somebody explain the value and potential of social media from a marketing perspective. So they often just pin a badge of “Marketing Expert” on an unsuspecting employee who seems to have some aptitude (has a Facebook account).

When you decide how to set your prices for something, it is marketing. When you perform a market feasibility study, it is marketing. When you accumulate customer modeling data and use that information to better understand what people want and need from your company, it is marketing. When you set up a new Facebook or Twitter account and cross your fingers and hope for amazing business results, that is not marketing. That is dreaming. Dreaming is not measurable, and only seldom is it profitable.

Aside From Being Social, Why Should People Buy From You?

Without an expressed reason for people to become your customer, efforts will generally fall into the category of branding. This includes when they are right there on your blog, where you want them to be. As an example, I use my blogs and social networks for reaching out to be helpful, and that emphasizes my branding. When I say “I take coffee and cigarettes and turn them into better SEO and social media marketing.” … that is my brand. All of that helpfulness and broad recognition in my industry is great. It leads to many opportunities, but it is not what actually makes the sale.

On the other hand, when I say “Call me to find out how I can help you to grow your business with a measurable return on investment” … that is advertising, and that is also marketing, but it is not branding. It is how I earn a living, and it is what improves my social media ROI. The branding is just what makes more people comfortable to call, and confident when they write me the check.

As you can imagine, when it comes to spreading a word far and wide, branding statements and being useful to others will often reach further and faster. This is because they are generally non-threatening to anybody. While, although this information is good food for thought and useful to many, I have already diminished much of its social media reach by making an advertorial statement (above).

Regardless how useful what I wrote here is, many people will be far less likely to share it with others. Part of that is due to cynicism, and part of it is due to competition. It takes a lot of branding to make up for and repair cynicism and people’s disinterest and distrust toward advertorials, even within a useful context. This is why I say that a balance is very important.

If you do not understand and differentiate the value measurements of branding and the value measurements of other areas of your marketing, calculating your return on investment will always be a bit cloudy and confusing.

Am I wrong? Go ahead and tell me why and we will hash it out until one of us agrees. 😉

Related Articles:

Photo Credits:
Confused Traffic Signal by caesararum via Flickr
Confusing Signals by Luis Argerich via Flickr
Confusing Signage by Tara Hunt via Flickr

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Hourly Rate for Setting Up Social Media Profiles?!

My blog is often inspired by things that happen in my real life. It is easier to tell something from experience than to make things up. Sometimes those things which happen in real life make me want to scream! I am going to share a good example.

I received a call from a friend yesterday. My friend was seeking some advice about social media, so I was delighted to provide my assistance. The question created one of those moments when I want to scream, pull my hair out, and choke people. My friend wanted to know how to set an hourly price to set up social media profiles for companies.

The question was important to her, because an advertising agency she works with had come to her asking for an hourly rate to help set up client’s accounts on Facebook, Twitter, and etcetera. She was caught off guard by their request, and so she asked me for an opinion of what it is worth.

My friend is a relatively popular blogger, and avid user of social media, but she is not really in the business of social media marketing. Strangely enough, they thought she could help. Since she does not want to turn away business, I feel for her dilemma. In this case, I suggested that providing a service that creates a zero net gain, or even a loss to the client is a good reason to either further educate the client, if they are open to learning, or to walk away from the offer.

I suggested that an hourly rate for setting up social media profiles, as with any other marketing or public relations service, should have a basis in the value to the client. In this case, the value would be minuscule, if not negative, and I explained some reasons this is the case. Of course, it began with the logic that any company who needs somebody just to set up their profiles is not likely to use those profiles for any significant benefit.

Creating social media profiles has extremely low value without a strategy, and without the manpower and mindpower to use them well. If they had that manpower, and more importantly, the mindpower, they wouldn’t need my friend at all. It all got me to thinking that it is like a dog chasing a train. What will the dog do if he catches it? The dog doesn’t know, and so the dog will not get much benefit from the chase.

I want to tell you a couple reasons this is a formula for failure.

Social Media Profiles Do Not Provide Value!

I understand that this may not make perfect sense to everybody, but I am going to try to make this easy. Sure, there are a lot of people who do not know how to get their name on Facebook, or how to create a Twitter username. My mother would not have a Facebook account if I had not set it up for her. My mother is not running a business and trying to promote her name, either.

Think for a moment … If my mother was in business, would it make sense to have somebody set up her account just so she could say “I’m on Facebook and Twitter”? What good is that? Is it so that people who already know who she is could magically flood her with new business? Why would they do that? Let me tell you the truth about this … They won’t!

The value of social media comes when you actually give people a reason to chose your company over the squillion other options out there in the marketplace. If you don’t have a clear reason for people to choose you over a competitor, or to recommend you to their friends because your company is awesome, what is the point? Is it the visibility that is so enticing? I want to assure you that there are millions of visible people who are failing in business. Having a social media profile is not going to make you more successful, and is very unlikely, in itself, to make you more visible.

A lot of people obviously do not yet understand that social media profiles are not going to spew crude oil or reveal a hidden gold mine. Perhaps everybody around you says “You have to be on Facebook” or “There are people making tons of money on Twitter.” The thing they don’t tell you, and probably do not realize, is that social media is not like a Hollywood “Field of Dreams” method for easy success.

This mentality is something I really try hard to understand, and I even try to be compassionate and patient about. The challenge is that when I explain it to people with solid proof, but they still have to learn things the hard way, I end up feeling bad for not having the strength to help them. That is crazy, right? I should not feel guilty for other people’s unwillingness to believe the truth, but I still do.

What About the SEO Value of Social Media Profiles

A lot of people seem to be convinced that there will be a big SEO (search engine optimization) benefit by having a lot of social media profiles. Social media can have an amazing impact on search engine rankings, but it is not why some people think, or hope, or would ask you to believe. The benefit comes when social media is used well, and more of the right people learn about your offerings and share it across their networks and link to your website from other places, such as their blogs and websites.

I understand how the false notion can seem almost logical, because each of those social media profiles will have a link to their website, and more links are a good thing.

There really is a lot of SEO value in social media, but it takes more than just setting up unused profiles. Otherwise we would all be in a race to have the most social media accounts. Some people are, but not the wise ones … not the informed ones. If you ever actually thought that the SEO comes from unused and unknown profiles, think again! Of course, most of the people seeking to pay for such a service would never take the time to read and learn about this, but for your amusement, I offer you some articles on the matter as follows:

100 Social Media Profiles or 1,000 … How Much Do You Want to Waste?

There is a constant pipeline filled with desperate companies hoping and begging for a quick and easy fix to increasing their business’ profit. However, with each company that sets up their social media profiles and endures the failure of short-sighted thinking, comes dozens of their friends and colleagues who will learn from their failure. This means that the pipeline will eventually slow down, and people will have to start thinking before they earn.

When Marketers Sell Negative Value, They Destroy Their Own Market

There is a rule in marketing that a lot of people try to overlook, but it is to their eventual regret. Regardless of the client’s request, it is the duty of a marketing professional to be sure that the client receives more value from the relationship than its cost. This goes for advertising agencies, independent marketing consultants, and in-house marketing departments.

The rule works like this: If the client / company receives less value, in the way of increased business, than the cost of the marketing efforts, it is not sustainable! Trying to work around this rule is like rubbing a lamp and hoping that a money genie will somehow magically come and make up for the screwups.

I realize that the conventional thinking is to give the client what they ask for, and to take their money. I see that as a huge mistake, and proof of a marketer who does not adhere to the same standards they expect of their clients. Good marketing consultants help clients to maintain their marketability and to avoid taking hazardous shortcuts. If the consultant just takes the money and gives a client what they ask for without questioning it, they are not doing their job.

As long as people are set on believing the myths of social media rather than the truth, they may as well say a toast to their own failure.

My Answer to This Question

My answer, if somebody asked me how much it would cost to set up their social media profiles would be something like this:

It will cost a bare minimum of $5,000 per month, and quite easily over $25,000. It will come with a whole lot of market research, strategy, implementation, and a well-forecasted return on investment. That means it will pay you a lot more than you pay me, but that is only if I believe in your company enough to hang my reputation on it. That does not happen with companies who are resigned to believing that simply “being on social media” will increase their profit. Thank you, but no thank you.

If you run your business by placing cost above value, you are making a big mistake. Instead of pouting about how much a successful marketing campaign will cost, it is better to focus on how much it pays. Then the more important factor is how to get your hands on the money it will take to achieve the results you are after.

Related Articles:
Yes, I put these here for you to read. I think they can help to emphasize why simply setting up social media profiles without a good strategy is a waste of time and money. You already have an idea whether you can afford me or not, so don’t worry … I am not selling you anything, and my prices will not go down just because you read more of my blog. Enjoy!

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The Biggest Fallacy of Social Media: More is Better

I want to discuss the biggest fallacy of social media for a moment. It surrounds a tightly held misconception that many people will refuse to let go of, because somebody with perceived authority told them it is “how social media is done.”

It is made worse every day because of all the people who have the mentality that “if they are doing it, it must be OK.”

People often want examples to follow. It makes them more comfortable with their decisions. Sometimes it turns out just great, but it often leads to a whole lot of “imitation marketing” with horrible results. Didn’t your dad ever use the line about your friends and a cliff with you?

“If they were all jumping off a cliff without parachutes, would you just follow along with them?”

–Dad

Enough of the crescendo, let me explain this famously popular trap that has become the biggest fallacy of social media. Did somebody tell you that you need whole bunch of people to “follow” you, “like” you, and “friend” you? The odds are great that the person saying that is full of crap about other things, too.

The truth about the biggest social media successes, and in fact, the way that things actually become “viral” is quite the opposite from what it seems. It does not happen because of a huge number of followers, friends, and fans. Success happens because of thinking, creating, and doing something amazing enough that your dearest core group of true listeners, who care what you have to say, share it with emphasis. Before you even consider anything else, it is important to concentrate on the “amazing” part.

Who are those “core listeners” I am referring to? They are the people who like what you have to say, enough that they subscribe to your blog, follow you on Twitter, Like your Facebook page, and link with you on LinkedIn. They pay attention because they want to know what you have to share, and not because they just want you to add to their numbers. They are often great people to have as your friends, too!

This topic was inspired by a discussion on Mark Harai’s blog, in an article titled “How to Build Online Influence“. My comment there was as follows:

“It is absolutely true about the numbers. I have enough “followers” in some circles to properly seed a new landfill. Without bilateral communication, that is where those relationships are.

I even wrote a book that gave strong caution to the big numbers game of social media. People really want so badly to believe in big numbers, unless they have big numbers, and then they understand.

The mentality is not so unlike like desire for wealth. Many people want it badly but they use it unwisely if they get it.”

What most people do is called “conventional”. Convention is lazy, and conventional will not make you stand out! It is why “The Pareto Principle“, also known as the 80/20 rule, always holds true.

No, I am not that guy who will tell you that successful marketing is only about building relationships to make your social media marketing successful. It takes a lot of other things, too. If you want my “short list” of things that make social media marketing successful, go to my blog archive. The list includes 267 (often lengthy) topics I have written about. Not a single one of them says to get more followers, but many of them certainly do address the importance of relationship building.

Social Media’s Hardest Lesson to Learn

I have argued against the mentality that more followers is the key, but it seems that as with most other things, people just have to learn it for themselves. They learn it the hard way, just like people dying to win a lottery who are broke a year after they collect their squillion dollar jackpot.

If you just can’t stand it, and you need proof that I am right about this, let me show you some numbers: 24 28 45 49 52 2

Those are your Murnahan lottery picks for this week. That will be easier for a lot of people to understand and accept than what I would say about the horribly over-valued hype about big follower numbers. By the way, this is last week’s winning Powerball Lottery numbers. Maybe they will “hit” again, you never know!

If you really want to know what I think, I offer you these previous articles which address the matter.

Social Media is Not Just Who You Know … It’s Who They Know!

I urge people to remember that social media is not just about you, and who you know, or who follows you. I know very well that I can bore the heck out of some people with things they have no interest in. I also know which people will find value in things which I produce, and I know which ones may be a good match to connect with other people in my circle of friends and “core listeners”. My friends and “core listeners” know these things about me, too. It is called networking, and it trumps all that you may hear about having a massive number of followers.

All it really takes to make something extremely popular is about 150 people who are connected to you the way I have described. Ironically, and conveniently, 150 is also the number that is commonly referenced as Dunbar’s Number. If you can focus on those people, the rest comes down to simply having brilliance, and you probably have a lot more than you are using.

Social Media Backlash of Extended Reach

Social media is a funny thing. Most people can figure out the basics of how to use social media websites like Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, blogs, and the squillion others. A few can figure out how to use social media well, and enhance their business. A tiny fraction of those people will use social media in a way that does not irritate or offend somebody, somewhere, for some reason.

Yes, social media popularity has its drawbacks, and there will always be some people who hate you, just for breathing. I have often said that if I don’t get a death threat now and then, I must not be reaching enough people. Even the littlest things can set some people off, but it is not my job to make everybody happy. I just want to make a few of the right people happy. Would you believe I actually had a death threat come as a result of this humorous article titled “Hookers Write the Best Blogs“?

You don’t need “death threat” levels of popularity to get all that you want and need from social media … nobody does. You just have to concentrate on your core listeners, and the awesomeness you can create for and with them. Let the rest of it come into place naturally and those followers will come to your awesomeness like a Murnahan to a plate of bacon.

Photo credit to scorpio58 via Flickr

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Social Media and The Absurdity of Implied Reciprocity

If you are one of those people who expect social media favors because somebody owes you something, just stop it! If you like something and find value in it, share it with others or do whatever it is that you do with good information. Just don’t assume that it means people owe you anything.

In business, and in life, reciprocity is a wonderful thing. It feels good to do business with people who do business with you, right? You have probably heard the old saying, “You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours.”

A problem with reciprocity comes when people start doing things they would normally not do, only in hopes of demanding favors in return. It is nice to reciprocate, but this does not mean it is implied.

I received a message on LinkedIn yesterday that read as follows: “Hi. I liked ur PAGE through LINKEDIN GROUP. Expecting ur LIKE and SUPPORT.” I thought to myself, “Really? You liked my page in order to add to my number of people artificially interested in my work and you want me to do the same? Oh, and ‘SUPPORT?’ Does this mean you want me to feed your kids, too?” I guess I just didn’t see that as any kind of favor.

If you like what I do, and you think you could learn something from a guy with over 20 years of successful marketing experience, by all means, “Like” my Facebook page. If you think you have done me some great favor and I am going to do you a favor by liking your Facebook page which has absolutely no interest to me, you need me worse than you think!

Why would you have any desire whatsoever to have me “Like” your Facebook page if I will never, ever, be a customer or recommend you to anybody because you are a a demanding douchebag who expects something from me?

If You Like Me, Just Like Me, But Stop Expecting Favors!

Rather than to rewrite the whole thing, I want to share something I said in a previous article titled “Do You Tweet and Retweet Seeking Favors?” Here is the closely paraphrased version:

People in the social media field often build relationships in which they will work together to spread a message. As long as there is honesty and integrity in the message, I am generally happy to help. However, I have been hit over the head with some of this recently. It seems that I get a lot of requests to scratch somebody’s back. It is all fine and good to be reciprocal, but is it good to take away the human filter that makes us who we are?

If all I was doing was tweeting, retweeting, blogging, Facebooking, YouTubing, Digging, Stumbling, and etcetera, because I hoped people would return the favor, would people still care what I had to say? I do not imagine the answer is “yes”.

Reciprocity Has Its Place

Don’t get me wrong, reciprocity certainly has its place, but if you are doing things with expectations of others doing things for you in return, don’t you at least think it should be something meaningful or useful?

The only time I recall actually being a little hacked by lack of reciprocity was from a car dealer. Hell, I purchased three brand new Corvettes and a Cadillac Escalade (total cost over $240,000) from this guy in under a year’s time, and I sent him many new customers. When he went to somebody else for his web hosting because it was cheaper than my recommended $209 per year plan, I kind of thought that was a bad business decision. Then when he asked me about a new website and used my website proposal to shop around, I wanted to kick him in the nuts. Yeah, I kind of felt slapped in the face, but I will still buy a car from him based on the merits of his business … not mine!

I Did Not Buy These Just to Sell a Website!

In summary, don’t “Like” my Facebook, subscribe to my blog, follow me on Twitter, link to this page, kiss my butt with kind comments in my blog, or anything else of the sort if it is only because you want something. Do it because you know I am not full of crap and because you receive value from my hard work.

I may reciprocate, but not because I feel guilty if I don’t.

I have just one more thought for you, and it is what my wife said when I mentioned this subject to her. Here is another way to look at it, and a brilliantly performed song.

Note that since I wrote this, I have replaced the Bonnie Raitt version of the song. Apparently she stopped allowing her YouTube videos to be embedded in web pages. this guy performs it nicely, too!

“I Can’t Make You Love Me“

Dog Photo Credit to wsilver via Flickr

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